Living Proof
by Drive all night
Summary: An unexpected pregnancy throws everything into chaos. Re-defining what it means to be family. #Burzek
1. Bad Sushi

_**So what if #WRECKEDitRICK had gotten his way and Burgess discovered her surprise pregnancy not long after Blair was murdered? How would she navigate an unexpected pregnancy and who was going be there at the end? **_

_**This little story just wouldn't go away so I had to get it out. It was clogging my flow. So here we go...let me know what you think.**_

Adam was surprised, he thought the locker room was empty. Everyone cleared out pretty quickly once Voight let them off the chain. He'd promised Atwater he'd catch up for a beer at Molly's once he'd finished his paperwork, he was always the last to leave. He typed as slow as a month of Sundays and was used to the ribbing.

"Oh Hey." He stuttered. He was surprised to see Burgess lying prostrate on the bench in the middle of the darkened room. Only a few lights were on and her arm was draped over her eyes to block out what little there was. "You okay Burgess."

"What?" Her arm dropped and eyes shot open when he spoke. "Adam?"

"In the flesh. Thought you'd gone?"

Swinging her legs around she sat up slowly, trying to stop her world spinning. "Nope. Just needed to sit for a minute."

"Minute? You left half hour ago. You okay?" He rested one hand on her shoulder and Kim shot him a look that told him it wasn't welcome. He let it fall back to his side.

"I'm fine Adam…." No matter how hard she tried she couldn't stop herself. The tears bubbled to the surface, she felt them pooling on her eyelashes like rocks and they spilled down her cheeks. "…I'm fine." She snapped as he reached for her again.

"Looks like it."

Kim pushed his hand away. "Don't Adam, just don't."

"Okay." He packed up his bag while Kim splashed water on her face and she knew he was watching her from the corner of his eye.

"Adam, really I am fine. Just tired. It was a long tough case. Some days it just gets to you, you know."

"I do." He nodded slamming his locker door shut. The crash made her jump a little and all the colour drained from her face, she swayed a little and reached for her sink to steady herself. "Are you sure you are okay? You look like you are about to toss your cookies?"

Kim took a couple of deep breaths. "Feel like it too, must have eaten something bad. Did you have the tuna sushi at lunch?"

"Nope, Chicken burger for me."

"Must be it then, I knew it was probably dodgy as soon as Kev said it was a bargain." Kim gathered her bag. "I should get home."

"Let me drive you."

"I don't think that's a good idea do you?"

Adam steered her from the locker room with his hand firmly on her back. He was less concerned with people talking than he was with getting her home before she spewed everywhere. If she was anything like him, when you felt like you wanted to die you wanted to do it at home, alone with no one watching. "We'll take your car; I don't want your lunch over my front seat."

"So sweet." A small laugh escaped her lips.

"Protecting my assets."

Kim did manage to keep her lunch to herself on the trip home and she had to admit being able to just close her eyes and let it happen was helpful. Adam offered to make sure she got inside but she baulked assuring him that she was quite capable of walking up a few flights of stairs and unlocking a door.

Waiting until she was well and truly through her door he called an Uber. Atwater had sent him several messages already bitching that he was late and had probably blown him off. In all honesty he wanted too but decided he really needed to make the effort. He hadn't caught up with Atwater much lately and Atwater wasn't particularly happy with him. It wasn't that he didn't like Hailey, she just wasn't right for his best mate and thought that Adam was being a dick about it all and wasn't shy about telling him just as much.

Of all the women that threw themselves at him over the past three years while he pined for Burgess he finally gave up waiting and screwed around with the one person he shouldn't have. When he asked him why he just shrugged. "Because there is no chance of a future, with either of them." With other women there was always the chance that they'd want more than he wanted to give them, there was no chance of that with Hailey.

"I don't know. You and Burgess..."

"Different worlds man, she's made that perfectly clear. Just took me a while to get it through my thick head."

"Nah…" Adam asked him to drop it and for a while they didn't really hang out but it was time to get back on track. He missed his buddy; he was just about the only person who understood him. He'd also felt guilty that he kept Atwater in the dark about what was going down with Antonio but he was doing it to protect him, he didn't want Atwater to have to lie for him, that wasn't fair. It had been a hard slog, with no one to lean on, he'd spent months without any emotional support, bar Voight and he'd hardly call it support and now was the time to get the show back on the road.

He'd been an asshole and made bad choices, but that wasn't unusual for him. He was better off alone and to some degree he had been alone for most of the past year.

It had been a mistake to not tell Kim himself but there were a lot of things at play. He'd been hurt, a lot going back more than three years and he carried that hurt and every time she turned to him he was there and then she'd tell him it meant nothing and she had no interest in revisiting the past and it crushed him every time. He should have said no, but he couldn't because part of him hoped that she'd wake up the next morning and realise that what they had was real and that he was ready for her now. She was just never ready for him and she was his weakness.

Now he could see his pattern, he just accepted things and did what he thought would make people happy whether he wanted to or not. Perhaps a hangover from his childhood when he was just trying to keep the peace in a volatile house. It was easier to play the game and agree to save himself from the meat grinder because if he popped his head up above the parapet he copped it between the eyes His childhood was spent keeping his mother happy so he could enjoy his childhood.

So when it was pointed out to him how hard it would be for her if people found out, that she'd probably lose her job and be accused of sleeping her way to the top like she had been before and that Kim would be hurt and not understand and make it even harder for everyone he took the cowards way out and did as he was told. Just like he didn't tell his father about all the men that visited his mother when he was at work. He was a gutless prick and he hated himself for it. Going into bat for Antonio in some way was to show people that he was a good honest guy and to keep Antonio out of trouble. That's what families did after all. That's what he did, he was the peacekeeper at the expense of his own happiness.

He'd apologised to Kim in the wash up after she dealt with Blair's murder. Without a second thought he had jumped in to help her push the case when everyone wanted to drop it. He believed her when she said things didn't add up because Kim never lied, she was a better person than just about anyone else in that team.

"About bloody time." Atwater threw his hands in the air. "You really need to learn how to type with more than two fingers." He pointed his two index fingers in the air and it was obvious that Atwater hadn't wasted any time.

"Yeah. I've seen you type; you may be quick but you need an interpreter to decipher what the hell you are on about. Slow and steady wins the race man, slow and steady."

"You've got some catching up to do." Atwater ordered him a beer and it arrived just as his phone beeped. He smiled just a little and typed a quick reply. "Another one on the hook?" Atwater cocked his eye, his toothpick dangling precariously from the corner of his mouth. "Now that you've broken the seal?"

"Nah, way too much trouble. I've sealed it back up. I had to drop Burgess home, that sushi you bought was tainted man, she looked like she was about to hurl."

"Shit."

"Yeah, she just sent me a message to say she was in bed, hadn't hurled yet."

"Still looking out for her huh?"

Adam took a slow mouthful of beer. "Always." He saw that Kevin was about to say something else but clammed up when he saw the look on Adam's face. Now was not the time to get into it again.

Kim rolled over and hit the alarm. She was surprised to hear it, having hit the sack the moment she got home she had to blink a couple of times before she realised that it was morning. Her sheets were barely wrinkled and she could slide out and a quick brush over with her hand and it looked like she had never laid down in them.

Jumping in the shower she felt a surge of energy that had been sorely lacking the past few days but by the time she got out, dressed and was making a coffee another wave of nausea hit her. Panic followed quickly and she stumbled blindly to the bathroom. It had mocked her for days, this on and off sense of dread.

Blinking a few times she squinted in the mirror and then the nausea overwhelmed her and she emptied the contents of her stomach into the sink. Sitting down heavily on the side of the tub she couldn't even cry.

How the fuck did this happen?

Calling out of work was something that she hated doing. It was a cop out but she just couldn't face going in, crawling back into bed she pulled the covers up over her head and tried to sleep it away. Which was crazy because if she knew one thing about herself it was if she was worried sleeping was the last thing on her mind.

The knock on the door got louder and louder and more persistent. Glancing at herself in the mirror on the way past she at least looked sick so if it was Voight checking up that she was actually off work for a reason all he had to do was take one look at her and realise she wasn't just faking it. She looked like death on a stick.

"You don't answer your phone now?" Kim opened the door to find Adam and he looked startled by her appearance. "Are you okay?" He handed her a bag. "Some electrolytes and something to eat to get you back on your feet. Voight said you called out."

Her slack jawed response made him nervous, she just stared and then she cried.

"What is it? Kim you are freaking me out?" They were still in the doorway, she hadn't moved, she made no attempt to take the bag her was proffering awkwardly. It was just a stunned silence.

"Oh God Adam."

"What's happened? Is it Nicole or Zoe?" He was scrambling to think what could possibly get her into this state.

"Adam….." Kim was visibly shaking. "I….oh god. I think I'm pregnant."


	2. Plastic Fantastic

"What? Whaddya mean pregnant?" He caught her as she started to sway. "Kim, talk to me." She was catatonic as he led her inside, pushing the door closed with his foot, he tossed the bag on the table and took her to the couch before he lost his grip. Sitting her down he perched on the coffee table and reached for her hands.

Kim jumped and reefed them away. "Adam?"

"Hey, it's okay. It's okay."

"What?"

"Kim, take a breath." He was worried about her; he was worried about himself. The knot in his chest was making it hard to focus. "It's okay."

"How?"

"How what? How did I get here? How did you get pregnant?"

"I need to go." Kim made to get up but her legs wobbled and Adam made her sit again.

"Okay Kim, stay here. I'll get you something to drink. Take a moment and then talk to me okay?" He waited until she nodded. Quickly he found a glass and filled it from the jug in the fridge, he at least remembered that she always kept cold water in the fridge, she had an aversion to tap water. "Here."

Her hands shook as she took it from his hand and it was a comfort that Adam rested his hands on her knees while she took a few sips. "So?"

"God Adam, I don't know. Maybe I am just freaking out over nothing."

"Maybe." He didn't even realise he was rubbing his thumbs over her leg until he looked down briefly. "Are you sure?"

"No, not I'm not sure. It's not like…" She gulped at the air. "No plans, I don't know. I thought it was food poisoning and then I kinda realised….ya know. It didn't happen, it hasn't happened for a while."

"What hasn't happened?"

Kim cocked her head to the side. He could be so man dumb sometimes, although to be fair she wasn't making sense at all. "Well sex obviously and you know, my period. Maybe it's stress. Don't worry about it." She attempted to push it out of her mind. "I'm just freaking out. It's stupid. I'll be fine."

Adam ignored her, he wasn't just going to nod and say okay and walk out of there despite his every nerve telling him to run. He knew where this was going for him and in the blink of an eye he was in it up to his neck. Even if she was freaking out he knew it would eat away at her if she didn't know. Kim never did well with the unknown or surprises. "Better be safe than sorry, you need to take a test. There's one you can get from a pharmacy right? There's a CVS just up the road, I can go grab you one."

"Why are you being so calm?"

"Externally calm, internally freaking the fuck out."

Kim smiled a little ruefully. "I've got the internal and external thing perfectly in sync."

Adam grabbed his keys and wallet and shot down to the CVS and grabbed one of each of the three different tests on the shelf. Each one said they were the most accurate and that's what he needed, numbers and certainty. Never in a million years did he think he'd be here, buying pregnancy tests for a baby that wasn't even his and the problem with that was it wasn't his baby but it was for the woman who he just couldn't stop loving. This was gut wrenching though. He felt in knots but he pushed through, it was instinctive.

His knew one of his biggest flaws was his impulsiveness. He always jumped in feet first and then couldn't or wouldn't back out. He leapt because she needed help and because, let's face it he was still in love with her. If he turned his back on her now he was no better than everyone else that had turned his back on him, and that included her.

No matter how he tried to rationalise it she had let him down. Even to this day he shouldered the blame for everything when it wasn't all his fault and he let people think it was because it was easier. Being a female cop it was far too easy to get a reputation that you didn't deserve and would never shake. Fair? Not even close to being fair, but it was what is was and he wasn't going to contribute to that. His pride was hurt but he sucked it up because if that meant she didn't bare the blame on top of all the other stuff that swirled around about her actions then so be it.

And now he was holding her hand waiting for a pregnancy test result for a baby that wasn't his.

He was fucked.

Kim could sense his unease, even through her rampant anxiety. "Why are you here?"

"Because you need someone and I am your someone right now."

"But Adam…."

He silenced her with a look. "Just accept it for what it is, you've got bigger things to worry about."

"It's taking my mind off what's going on just over there." She pointed to the bathroom. Inside that tiny room right now was an innocuous piece of plastic that held the key to her entire future.

"Fair point." Adam nodded, checking his watch. They had thirty more seconds to wait. "So, Blair yeah?"

"Yeah."

"What are you going to do?"

"Oh God Adam, I don't know. I haven't…." she just couldn't find the words. "I just…." When the alarm went off she jumped out of her skin.

"You want me to?"

"No, I'll do it." Pushing herself up off the bed she took the few shaky steps she needed to cross the floor to the bathroom.

Adam didn't watch her; he just closed his eyes. He wouldn't call it praying, that wasn't his thing but he had hope. For what he wasn't sure. It wasn't fair to wish away a baby, if that's what this was but part of him didn't want this for her. Somewhere deep in his soul, if she really wanted to know he'd tell her, still to this day that he wanted this for them.

The silence was deafening.

When he opened his eyes she was standing in the doorway, clutching the little piece of plastic. "Adam." Her desperate sob propelled him out of his seat and he reached her just as her legs buckled.

"It's okay Kim, we'll figure it out."


	3. Radio Silence

Adam had about twenty minutes to get his head straight. They'd caught a case and not only had Atwater messaged him but Voight as well. "You be okay?"

"Sure."

"Yeah? You going to make an appointment to see a Doctor? I gather these things are not like set in stone." He'd studied the box in the Pharmacy while he was deciding which one to get and they all mentioned that it needed to be followed up for confirmation. He didn't quite get it but what would he know. This was all new for him.

"Sure."

"Kim?"

"Adam it's okay, just go." She wrung her hands together. "Can you like, not tell anyone."

He kissed her forehead supportively. It was the most he could do. "Not my news to tell."

"Thank you." It wasn't just thanks for keeping it to himself, it was a thank you for staying and helping and not judging. Judgement was the last thing she needed right now; she was doing enough of that for herself.

Jumping in the shower as soon as he left she tried to wash away the clammy feeling she had. It didn't work. Drying herself off she decided to take the other two tests that Adam had bought. When he came back with them she thought he was mad but that was probably because one part of her believed that she'd take the first one, it would be negative and that would be it.

Now she stared at all three, all positive.

Atwater was waiting for him when he pulled up at the scene. Handing him a pair of gloves he asked about Burgess. Voight had told him that Ruzek had stopped by just to check on her because her message was weird. _'Can't come in, sorry. Sick.'_

"She's crook as a dog. Looks like death warmed up. Cursing your name for buying her dodgy tuna."

"Poor girl. She'll be back tomorrow?"

"Yep." Adam ducked under the crime scene tape. "What we got?"

"Gang shoot-out, unfortunately a four year old kid got caught in the crossfire. Mom is on her way to Med, critical. Trying to find out if it's wrong place wrong time or what?"

"It's a kid, it's always wrong place wrong time." He snapped. Today of all days he didn't need a case involved with kids, it was too close to the bone. "Sorry." He caught Atwater's side-eye.

"You okay Dude?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just didn't sleep well. Those beers kept me awake peeing half the night."

"Old man's bladder?"

"Yeah, something like that."

It was a tough hard slog but once he got into it he pushed everything else out of his mind. It was a good thing that he didn't have a moment to himself. He had fired off a quick text and got a one word response. _'Do you need anything else?'_

_'No'_

As the clock ticked past midnight it was way too late to message her or drop in after they had wrapped for the day but he found himself checking his phone every other minute. Not that that was unfamiliar, he'd spent way too many hours doing that before and the silence then was just as deafening as it was now.

He crawled into bed and then out again three hours later when a second related gang hit lit up the night.

Kim had spent the day alternating between sobbing into her mattress and walking around in a daze. She'd found a family planning clinic across town who did walk in appointments. It was insane to drive two hours across traffic to have a blood test but she wanted to make sure no one she knew saw her. Knowing her luck she'd walk out and smack into someone from the district.

The Doctor only confirmed her fears. Yes she was pregnant, about six weeks. They gave her pre-natal vitamins, a load of pamphlets to read and an appointment for two days' time if she decided this was not what she wanted. "You will need someone to drive you home afterwards, you may still be groggy and perhaps it might be wise to have someone stay with you overnight just in case you experience any complications."

She just nodded blindly. She had never felt so utterly alone and desolate in her whole life. Her sister, Nicole had never recovered from her rape, not emotionally anyway and Kim had reached out to her on so many occasions only to be shut out every time. Nicole didn't blame her for what happened but seeing her sister was a constant reminder of what had happened and she just couldn't get past it. Turning to Nicole felt like too much right now, if she shut her out again she had no idea what to do.

Who else was there? Platt, not an option. She'd be pulled from Intelligence before she could even catch her breath. The risk of anyone in Intelligence finding out was too great. It was bad enough that Ruzek knew but strangely she had faith in him to keep her secret.

Did she even want it? At some stage she always dreamt of being a mother, but not like this. The father of her child wasn't around, and not just not in the picture, he was dead. Murdered and for what? Politics. It was a waste but even if he was alive would she have wanted his child? They hadn't been together long enough to decide that. She knew she certainly didn't have the soul crushing desire for him like she'd had once before.

What about his family? Should they know, would they want to know? What if they wanted to be in the child's life? Would they want her to have it? Would they hate her if she didn't?

And what about Adam? He'd hurt her, a long time ago and now he was there. He knew her deepest secret and he knew her better than most. She'd been at her most vulnerable and open when they had been together because she thought it was forever. In the past he'd seen her at her lowest, and today, she'd hit a new low and he was there too.

Since then she'd turned back to him a few times when she felt lonely and he was always there. And then he moved on, and despite the fact she was and had been seeing other people the knowledge that he had moved on was like a fresh wound. A barely healed scab that once picked again started to bleed. She knew it was over with Hailey and neither of them seemed bothered by it but it bothered her and she hated that because she had no reason to judge, she'd done something similar hadn't she?

Yet, he was there again when she needed him the most. Like he'd done so many times before. Relying on him seemed to be too big a leap to take, at least right now but he was all she had. Three people in this world knew her secret. A Doctor she'd probably never see again, herself obviously and her long ago but never quite forgotten ex fiancé. Life couldn't have been more messy if she tried.

It all swirled around inside her and she sat in her car for a good half hour just trying to breathe.

Adam forced himself to keep his face neutral when they arrived back at the District, hauling themselves in just after 8AM and found Kim was sitting at her desk.

"Burgess? Tuna Sushi for lunch? My buy." Atwater patted her shoulder on the way to his desk.

"Very funny. Never again." Kim did an amazing job of appearing completely unfazed. "If you weren't such a tight ass and sprung for stuff that wasn't on markdown that'd be grand."

Voight bought up the rear. "Burgess, glad to have you back." He turned to the white board. "Where we at?"

They ran through the board and added the latest information they had gathered. No one was talking and that frustrated them, not that is was unusual, gangs rarely went running to the cops when a gang war broke out then tended to clam up and take matters into their own hands and that's what worried them the most. He doled out the jobs. "Ruzek, get Burgess up to speed while you pick up Leishman."

Grabbing her coat she didn't even wait for Adam, he needed to hit the head before they left. She was leaning on the car, flipping through the case notes when he jogged up. "Before you start, can we not, not here." Kim held up her hand to stop whatever was about to come out of his mouth.

"Okay." He unlocked the car and slid into the driver's seat. "But before we go…are you?"

"Yes."

"And?"

"I don't know yet Adam."


	4. Enough

"What the fuck are you doing?" Adam seethed at her, pulling her behind his car and out of earshot. Not only had she put herself at risk but Rojas as well when she leapt out of a car and chased a perp into an unsecure house. Rojas had followed her of course and they were lucky to not be riddled with bullets when shots started ringing out. Adam and Halstead had scrambled to follow them, stunned that they actually didn't wait for back-up.

"My job."

"Your job is to not get killed and protect your partner. You wait for back-up." He was furious. "This is fucking insane."

"Back off Adam."

It had been ugly for almost a week and Adam had reached his wits end so he gave her a lot of hard truths and he hoped he had got through to her. She couldn't keep hiding it. He found it hard to walk the line because she kept putting herself in dangerous situations and when he challenged her he was politely reminded it had nothing to do with him.

He threw up his hands, not for the first time. "Fine, you are right, it's got nothing to do with me but don't expect me to just stand by and let you put yourself into stupid situations, situations I might add that you would never have contemplated before. It makes no sense." He angrily tapped his temple. "I wouldn't do it if you weren't pregnant and I certainly won't do it now. If you are not going to look after yourself then I will."

"Back off Officer Ruzek."

"Officer Ruzek? Wow?" he took a step back, stunned by her bitterness. "You know what, I've had enough." He spat at her. "I'll go to Voight and ask him to put me with someone else, tell him that I can't work with you because I know I have no say in this.." He pointed to her stomach. "..but what I do have a say in is removing myself from a situation that I don't feel comfortable with. He'll probably ride my ass but what the hell. You don't want to care about yourself or your baby, the baby that you decided to keep that's fine by me, but you can't ask me not to care or pretend I don't see what you are doing."

"Oh God, this has nothing to do with you. It's not your career in jeopardy is it? I tell Voight I'm benched." She clicked her fingers. "Just like that and I may never get my spot back."

"Oh, for Fuck's sake. You know how Voight thinks. You are in his team because you are family. This Unit is family, he's not going to kick you out. So you'll be on a desk, in Intelligence most probably, working with us every day, you know it so don't give me this woe is me bullshit."

"Easy for you to say. You've never had the threat of losing your job."

"No? I walked away from Intelligence because of you, remember?"

"I didn't ask you to, that was all on you."

"I know and did I ever blame you? Huh? I still risked it all though didn't I? I am just pointing out some facts seeing as you seem to think you are the only person who has done it tough or had uncertainty. I spent a night in jail and had my badge pulled and I still have no idea what Voight did to get it back, but I suspect one wrong move and it will be over. So don't tell me I don't know what it's like to almost have your whole family ripped out from underneath you, because I do, I do know. You may lose your spot temporarily but you won't lose your career or your future, I could have lost it all."

"Go to hell Adam."

"I am in fucking hell."

"You don't know what it's like."

"No I don't know what it is like to be you and you don't know what it is like to be me, to watch you put yourself at risk day in day out just to prove a point. I get it, you are pregnant not crippled, you can still be a cop but you know what? You've got no idea how hard it is to not want to protect you and your baby. I'd risk my life for you every single fucking day, but I don't want to do it because you can't be fucked looking after yourself." He stormed off. She wanted to do this on her own it was fine by him. All she had to do was say the word but be dammed if he was standing around to watch her risk it all to prove a point. He wasn't having that on his conscience.

He hated doing it but he gave her an ultimatum. Waiting for her beside her car when she left she District he saw her shoulders slump when she saw him. He knew what she was doing, he'd left an hour ago and she had nothing to do upstairs so she was just waiting for him to be well and truly gone. If Voight had been upstairs he wouldn't have waited but he wasn't there so he knew she wasn't telling him, there was nobody around.

"Before you start on me again I will just say this. You tell Voight by the end of the week or I will ask to be reassigned."

"Come on Adam, that's not fair."

"Nor is it fair to ask me to ignore what I know and that you are risking it all because you are scared. I get that, I get that you are terrified. I get that everything changes for you from that moment on, but it already has changed for you Kim, it changed the moment you decided to keep the baby. I'm not saying tomorrow, but by Friday, yeah?"

"I can't believe you." Kim reefed open her door. He could literally see the steam coming off her. She was pissed but he didn't care. This had gone on long enough, she was almost three months pregnant.

"Yes you can. You want me to do this because you are too scared to do it yourself." He pushed himself off the side of her car and reached for his bag that was at his feet. "See you tomorrow Officer Burgess."

It was clear as day that he was distancing himself from her, she'd seen the look on his face when she called him Officer Ruzek, it had stung him and made him angry. He just couldn't do it anymore, the stress he was under was getting to him. Someone was going to get killed if this went on much longer. Him? Perhaps and he wasn't quite ready to die just yet.

Pulling into his parking space the next morning he saw Kim's car already parked up. He had left her alone last night, or more to the point he wasn't stupid enough to try and communicate with her. She didn't want his help; he wasn't going to beg her to accept it. The offer was on the table, it had been from day one. It was up to her now.

Grabbing his coffee out of the console he glanced around and took note that nobody else was here yet. That was a relief, he was sure the only reason Burgess was here so early was to get it over and done with before the crowd arrived. It may have been hard to say last night but he had faith she just needed the push.

Coming up the stairs he saw the hug, even catching the faintest of smiles on Voight's face. Voight said something and inclined his head in Adam's direction and Kim swung her head around and saw him.

"Ruzek, a word." Voight beckoned him when Kim left his office. She smiled at him and nodded slightly as she passed by his desk and disappeared downstairs, there was one more person that needed to know.

Closing the door behind him he just stood and waited for his boss. While he was expecting her to tell Voight, he didn't expect that she would involve him. She had made it very clear yesterday that it wasn't his baby to worry about. "I want you and Burgess to partner up today."

"Okay."

"It's her last day on active duty and I need you to make sure she stays safe."

"I've been doing that."

"I know, I just want you to know I know." Voight scratched at his jaw. "Is she going to be okay?"

"I hope so."

"And you?" he tilted his head as he saw the heads of the rest of the team coming up the stairs.

Squeezing his hands together he shook them slightly. "Right now, I'm all she's got. I won't let her down, not again."

"Look after her today."

"Will do." He threw his boss a quick and lazy salute. Atwater eyed his suspiciously as he came out.

"What you do this time?"

"You know." Ruzek shrugged. "We were talking about a man with a dog."

Atwater knew two things, he was full of shit, and something was going down that he wasn't supposed to know about. "Dawg, remember last time you kept secrets? You ended up in the can for a night."

"Kev, you wanna gossip go hang out with Platt. You know she loves a good session."

In the best interests of Kim he said nothing, the train was in motion now and tomorrow was soon enough to let it come out and this was her last day and he sensed that it would be important for her to have it as business as usual as they ran the board for the day and Voight assigned tasks. They got the witness statements, which while necessary wasn't exactly thrilling work but someone had to do it.

"Sorry you've got the shitty jobs today." Kim muttered on the way to the car. "I know you love this stuff."

"Ah I get to spend the day with your pretty face beside me, what's not to love."

"Too much Adam."

He nodded; he knew it but it was in his DNA to flirt especially with her. He couldn't help himself. "Hey, how'd it go with Voight."

"Well I am sure I don't need to tell you because he hauled you in there to no doubt tell you all about it."

"He told me that I was working with you today, to look after you and make sure you are okay. That's it. I have no idea what else went down."

Kim sighed and closed her eyes. She felt nauseous and hungry all at the same time. "He was happy for me, which is funny because I don't know if I am happy for me. He'll work on a plan with Trudy about what I can and can't do but basically as of tomorrow I'm on a desk."

"At your desk though? Upstairs?"

"Yes. Yes you were right." Kim responded flatly. "Happy now?"

"Am I happy you told Voight and no long putting yourself at risk, then yes I am happy. I am also happy that you are still with us. I'd miss you."

"Why are you doing this?" It was a question she'd asked him many times and she always got the same answer. _'because you need help and I'm a good guy.'_

Until today, "Because I think you know why but now is not the right time. I think you've always known the answer, you just never wanted to hear it."

"You and Upton?" Kim just blurted it out. So many times she had wanted to ask him about it but her courage always failed her. Perhaps she didn't want to know the answer, she didn't want him to admit that Upton meant as much to him as she did. On top of all this she wouldn't be able to cope with that so she just swallowed it.

"Ever heard of rebound?"

"After three years?"

"Takes some people longer than others." It was a not so subtle dig at her and Adam shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He didn't want to talk about it. It was a mistake and all he could say was it was a distraction because he had no strong attachments, he wasn't happy and he never felt comfortable and he didn't look forward, he knew it had an end date and they both walked away with no lingering feelings. It was like it never happened and they both preferred it that way.

"It hurt."

"I know, I know how that feels."

"I guess." Kim sucked in a few deep breaths as all the colour drained from her face and he slowed down a little to ease the drive. "You know, that's how I ended up with Blair, he asked me out just before I found out about….you and I was stinging and hurting and I said yes and it kinda snowballed and I didn't stop it."

"Ditto."

"I didn't love him; I don't think I ever would." Kim lamented. "I know when he died I thought maybe I was perhaps heading down that path but I think that was just the emotion of it all." Kim stared out the window, unable to look but she knew he was watching her, she could feel it. "It just wasn't like that, I didn't get that rush, that heart thudding feeling."

"Ditto."


	5. 5 DeCaffeinated

"I called Blair's sister last night."

"Really? How'd that go?" Adam knew how stressed about it she was, she had gone back and forth on whether to tell them or not and at the end of the day he told her he couldn't make that decision for her and whatever she chose she had to live with.

"I can definitely say shocked. I'm not sure what's going to happen next. She says she's going to come to Chicago in a couple of weeks to see me."

"You nervous?"

"A little. Makes it real, ya know."

"I think it's pretty real." He patted her tiny belly. At night, at the end of the day it was starting to stick out a little. Adam had come for dinner, mainly to make sure she was eating. They'd had a busy day and he noted that two donuts, one cup of decaf and a handful of almonds was not enough to sustain one person, let alone one and a half.

She'd been on desk duty for two weeks now and it wasn't as bad as what she was expecting. Voight still did let her out of the District if it was filing paperwork with the courts or simple witness statements. He had gone back and forth on that, always wary that sometimes simple tasks blew up in their faces in a major way but Burgess had begged and both Adam and Kevin had promised to look after her.

It wasn't the most exciting work and she did miss the rough and tumble and got jealous when they came back in and were talking about what had just gone down. She always got to listen on the radio's and did also get to be a small part of it. Not great but better than she imagined.

Physically she was starting to feel better and Adam had noted a change in her attitude. She wasn't as tired and the emotional toll of worrying about her wellbeing, whether she wanted to admit it or not, had eased and that came through in her moods.

Although some days, they were way off. He rolled with it and was just learning when he was being a 'godsend' and when he was 'satan.' Sometimes it changed in the space of one sentence.

Adam had sat and listened to her one night as she went on an impassioned rant. "I don't want his baby but I can't not have this baby. It wasn't supposed to happen like this and I just couldn't make it go away because I couldn't live with myself. And what if this is the only chance I'd get, what if I am like 60 and sitting alone with cats and wondering why I threw away the only chance I ever got. At least I can raise this child how I want, I don't have to worry about custody, visits and all that drama, right? It's like a sperm donor thing, right?"

"Not quite, but it is your baby." Adam was desperate to tell her that this wouldn't be her only chance but couldn't. Nor could he tell her to abort the pregnancy, it wasn't his call. "You can do whatever you set your mind to, look at how single minded you were about Intelligence and you got there in the end. I have faith in you."

"Do you want me to have this baby?"

"Ahhh…." He didn't know how to answer but Kim forced him. "No, no I don't, but I'm just being selfish."

"Why?"

He cocked his head and gave her a withering look and she got it. "Oh, that."

"Yes that." Adam hated how tight in his chest it felt, he was jealous of a dead guy and that was just fucking stupid. "But, you are having this baby and I will be with you every single step of the way, if that's what you want. And probably even when you don't want me to be here, because I am annoying like that and this is what I want to do to prove to you….." he trailed off.

"Prove what?"

"That I wasn't the guy you decided I was."

"The non-commitment type of guy?"

"Yep that one. You were wrong. Just so you know."

"We fucked a lot of things up didn't we?"

"Yep."

Kim had called Kevin and asked him to come over the night she'd finished her last day in the field. "Let's meet at Molly's?"

"Nah, Kev, I need a night at home." When he rocked up with a six pack Kim just took it, pulling out one beer and handing it to him and placing the rest in the fridge. Kevin just filled the space around him and she suddenly felt claustrophobic and nervous.

"Not drinking?"

"Nope."

"Drying out after Christmas?"

Kim grabbed the bottle from his hand and turned it over to read the label. "According to the Surgeon General, women should not drink alcoholic beverages during pregnancy because of the risk of birth defects."

"Huh?" He looked a little blank.

"Do I need to repeat it?"

"No…actually Yes." Atwater gaped at her and then it dawned on him.

"I swear you are dumber than Ruzek some days, and that's saying something."

"So you and Ruzek are….?"

"Oh god no, no but I am pregnant…" She spoke slowly. It hadn't got any easier to say the word pregnant nor to say Blair's name. "Blair is the father… or was."

"The dead guy?"

"Yes Kevin, the dead guy. Thanks for pointing that out."

"Does Ruze know?"

"You are annoying me no end." Kim was exasperated. "Yes, he knows, he's been great."

"Ruzek, like our Ruzek?"

Kim threw up her hands, she was over Kevin already. Just because she invited him over and wanted to tell him before everyone else it didn't mean she was exactly bouncing off the walls with happiness either. Turning her back on him she fussed around in the kitchen but Kevin's arms wrapping around her broke her bad mood. "Hey Girl, we having a baby. Congratulations. You are gonna be a good little Momma Bear." He kissed her cheek. "Uncle Kev reporting for duty."

Kim squeezed his arms tighter around herself. "Thanks Kev."

"So you got a picture of my little Bub?"

Kim untangled herself from his bear hug and dug out the photo of her last ultrasound. Kevin had the same confused and bemused look that Ruzek had when she first showed him. "Are you sure, this looks like you swallowed a magic Bean?"

"I am sure. Anyway, I told Voight this morning so it's desk duty for me from tomorrow."

"What about Blair's family?"

"Give me a chance I'm still in shock."

"Me too Girl, me too." Kev swapped the ultrasound photo for his half-finished beer. "What you gonna do?"

"Have a baby Kev."

"Uncle Kev. I like the sound of that. Uncle Kev and Uncle Adam. Kid don't know how lucky he is."

Kim was sitting at her desk early. For some strange reason she had re-arranged her desk three times. If she was going to be stuck here for months on end it had to be just the way she liked it. "Morning Burgess." Ruzek was the first to arrive. They had shared a few texts last night so he knew Kev was clued in and everyone else would be bought in this morning. He dropped a blueberry bagel from her favourite bakery on her desk. "You didn't eat this morning right?"

If he didn't already know about Kev being informed of the big news the long stream of messages from Kev that started around six am was confirmation enough. They started with _'Fuuuuccckkkk' _and went from there.

"I did, I had a banana."

He tapped the desk and headed to the breakroom to make a coffee. "Eat." Slowly the rest of the team straggled in. Upton headed to the breakroom and held out her cup for a coffee fill from Ruzek. "It's decaf."

She snorted "Why? You need caffeine to breathe."

"Cleaning up my act."

Hailey practically snorted her coffee all over the bench as she laughed. "I'd like to see that. I give you a week."

"Been on Decaf for a month." He gave a wry smile; they barely spoke to each other these days. Then again they didn't talk beforehand either so it was just a resumption of normal programming after a little deviation. "Glad you noticed."

"Okay." Voight came out to kick the day off, Ruzek strolled out of the breakroom and Upton followed shortly after. Kim's eyes quickly glanced at him and he just rolled his eyes, he fully understood that some days she still battled some lingering jealousy, despite his assertion that he told Hailey after their stupid drunken hook-up that he was still in love with Kim. Surprisingly he thought that would make things better but Kim was pissed. He wasn't sure if it was at him or Hailey and he was too scared to ask. They didn't talk about it again. "Need to shake things up a little. Ruzek and Atwater, Halstead and Rojas, Upton you are with me."

"What Sarge?" Upton started to protest. They'd been through this before, she worked best with Halstead and that was her preference and she didn't like change. Being with Voight would mean she'd be in here more than out doing real police work and that wasn't what she signed up for.

"I said you are with me."

"What about Burgess?" Kim sat quietly; she knew eventually it was going to come back to her. That's what this was all about after all. Adam didn't speak either, he was staying out of it. "Jay and I work best together."

"Burgess will be on desk duty for the foreseeable future."

"Why?"

"CPD's Pregnancy Protocol." He said very matter of fact and then wanted to move on, Kim didn't want to make a big deal out of it in front of everyone and even this was too much. "Right, now, where are we at?"

Kim leapt up from her desk and posted the photos of the two suspects they were hunting down. She was desperately keen to prove her worth to the team, she knew that Voight and Platt went out on a limb to ensure she stayed with Intelligence. They had removed the position when Nadia was murdered and had functioned well without it according to the brass, so it was trial to see whether it was a valid role. "LKA's are attached. The warrants will be signed off on shortly."

It also gave nobody the chance to say anything. Having gone through it with Voight, Kevin and Platt in the last twelve hours she had nothing more to give.

Platt had been interesting. She had headed downstairs after telling Voight and because she didn't want to watch him talking to Adam and wonder what they were talking about. It had taken her all day to get over it and Platt had caught her coming in this morning and given her a 'mom cop' mug and the weirdness of the previous day was forgotten.

"Hey Sarge, got a minute?" Kim breezed.

"Not really Burgess, you know these bright young Officers cannot organise a meat raffle let alone their day." Platt waved her away.

"Oh okay." She bounced on her feet. "But seriously I need a minute." Kim pointed to the spare office and didn't wait to see if Platt followed her. The heavy sigh told her that she was standing behind her though. Voight was going to talk to Platt once they'd got started on the case and she didn't want her to find out from him.

"This better be of monumental importance. Burgess."

"Uhh, I've just informed Voight so wanted to tell you too. Anyway, I'm pregnant." Kim just blurted it out. She had done the same to Voight, although his response was a little more like she expected. He'd been shocked but had hugged her quickly.

"You are what?"

"Pregnant."

"Pregnant?" She shook her head like she'd heard wrong.

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Why, why what? Why am I pregnant? Why am I telling you?"

"Yes."

"Ummm…"

Kim was shocked when Platt turned and walked out without waiting for a response. She stood there for just a moment and watched her walk to her desk then turn around and come back closing the door behind her. "So pregnant….Ruzek?"

"No." Why did everyone just think it was Adam's? It was a little annoying to be honest. Every single person so far had asked the same question. Adam just shrugged it off even when Kim reminded him that it meant that he was a cheater. His argument was that he knew he hadn't and he didn't give a flying fuck what other people thought.

"Blair?"

"Yes."

"Oh, okay. Fine, fine. Wow, not what I was expecting. You know about condoms and things like that don't' you?"

"I do…. horse has bolted Sarge."

"So it seems." Platt smiled faintly. "Huh, Wow. Okay. Is that all Burgess?" She turned to leave, resting one hand on the doorknob and turned back slightly to look at Kim who was looking pale and like she was going to vomit. "I'd prefer Aunt Trudy, I'm not old enough to be a grandmother."

Along with the cup Platt told her she was coming over to talk to her after work and Kim knew better than to argue, although she did try to convince her to wait until the weekend to no avail.

"Hold on…..pregnant? As in a baby pregnant?" Halstead spoke first. "How pregnant are we talking?"

"Yes pregnant with a baby, not a cat or a dog, I am about three months pregnant with a human. It's fine, I'm excited, I feel good so let's focus on work." Kim sat back down at her desk and opened her emails. "Warrants are here." She sent them to the printer. Jumping up to grab them she wasn't surprised when Upton followed her.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Why would I?" That seriously perplexed her, they'd barely had two conversations in two years and one of them was about her dating her ex-fiancé for six months on the sly. She'd swallowed it that day because she wanted to be the adult in the room, but it hurt, like hell and she'd had it out with Ruzek. Surprisingly they didn't yell and scream, it was all very civil and they'd each made their points about how they had both treated each other poorly in the past. They were trying to 'get over it' but it was harder than it sounded, especially in her current highly emotional and hormonal condition.

"You shouldn't have to do this alone."

"I'm not alone."

"Is this because of Ruzek, the reason you kept it a secret?" Kim was surprised she went there straight away. "Is it Adam's?"

"No."

"But he knows? I guess that's why he's gone Decaf to help you hide it for a bit longer? Trying to be the good guy?" Kim wasn't sure if she was trying to be funny or not but it wasn't the time for it.

"He is a good guy." Kim clapped back. "He's always been a good guy and he's always been there for me."

"I know, I'm sorry." Hailey stuttered.

"Yet you were quick to assume he cheated on you. Is that how little you think of him and of me?" Kim snapped. It was just the straw that broke the camel's back.

"Sorry, I didn't think." Hailey was suitably chastised, it was a fault of hers, she spoke without thinking and it often got her into trouble. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you; it was just hard for me you know with…."

"I'm sorry Hailey, this isn't about you right now. Can we drop it? Thanks for the good wishes though, means a lot." Kim's really didn't want to talk about it and not once had she asked about her since Blair was murdered, so getting into a personal conversation felt uncomfortable and unnecessary. They moved in the same world but their own orbits never crossed. They were totally different people and that was okay, there was no point trying to force it. Kim didn't have the energy for it at the moment.

When she dropped the warrant for Halstead on his desk he reached for her hand and squeezed it. "Congrats Burgess. How you doing?" Without even asking he had a fair idea who the father was and that had to be a kick in the guts for her.

"I'm getting my head around it, it's exciting, terrifying but exciting."

"I can imagine, it sounds terrifying, all of it, especially the getting it out bit."

"No, the terrifying part is the threat of Uncle Adam and Kev."

"Count me in too. Uncle Jay is gonna rock."

"Great." She rolled her eyes dramatically but her eyes were smiling. "Can't wait."

It did feel better now that it was out of the way. The anticipation had been much worse than the reality and she suddenly felt less alone. Not only did she have Adam, but now her world included Kevin and Platt. They had made it very clear that they were in this for the long haul.

The next hurdle was her family and Blair's. One day at a time though, she just needed to go home, have a shower, get into some comfy clothes and prepare herself for the 'Platt chat'.


	6. Platt Chats

_**Well look...yet another total #Burzek fuck you from TPTB of Chicago PD...is anyone surprised? I think I'm close to putting the #Burzek ship in dry dock, and selling parts of it off for scraps. **_

_**Lucky this story is already written and finished because they have killed my buzz completely.**_

Be Good' His message was simple. He knew how nervous she was about meeting Blair's sister. Her own family had been shocked and a little harsh about her news which devastated Kim. Nicole just told her that's nice and then went on an anti-man rant and her mother gave her a lecture about safe sex, a little too late obviously. There was no offer to come help or see her, but they did tell her to call if she needed anything and to let them know how she was going.

Now her nerves were all over the shop meeting Ginny, Blair's sister.

Kim folded and refolded the napkin in front of her. It had been a good week or so since she'd felt nauseous but today she felt queasy.

"Kim?" A tall black lady come to a standstill beside her. "Are you Kim?" She was impeccably dressed with the same bright smile of her brother.

Nervously Kim leapt up and awkwardly hugged the woman, who seemed surprised. "Hi…sorry." Kim stuttered when the woman took a step back and offered her hand instead. Kim had hugged her because she didn't know what else to do.

"I'm Ginny."

"Nice to meet you." Kim offered for her to sit. "Please, sit down. Can I get you a coffee?"

"Thanks, long black for me." Kim waved the waitress over and added a coffee to her order.

"I really appreciate you coming out, this is all a bit awkward isn't it?"

"A little, Blair talked about you a bit. I was surprised when he talked about moving to Chicago and he admitted that he had met someone. He was pretty vague though." Ginny leant back, her long fingers clasped together on the table. "Tell me about yourself."

Kim suddenly felt like she was on the wrong side of the interrogation table. "Uhhh, I'm a cop, that's how we met."

"A cop, wow. Didn't expect that."

"No? I love it. I'm so lucky that I've got the opportunity and they have kept me working with my team, not out in the field as much but it's good, really good" Kim looked down at the table at the neatly folded napkin as she tried to fill the awkward silence. "This wasn't planned."

"I figured." Ginny gave her a tight smile. They were two woman who had nothing but at ghost of a man and an unborn baby between them. "So how are you and the baby?"

"We are good, it's going well so far. A little rough to begin with but I feel good now, just tired."

Kim sat back a little while the waitress delivered their order. She caught Ginny's slightly disapproving look as the coffee was placed in front of Kim. "Decaf." She offered to ease her mind.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to…." She trailed off and didn't finish.

"I hate that it's Decaf but I just couldn't give it up completely. A few of my colleagues have gone Decaf in sympathy. They aren't loving it either."

Ginny wasn't really the chit chat type, not with people she didn't know and this whole situation was a little surreal. "So Kim, I'm not quite sure how or what you want from us so I thought I'd just lay it out."

"Okay."

"We want to be involved. We lost our brother." Kim knew that Blair had two sisters and one of them lived in the UK and he hadn't seen her for almost ten years. "Our parents are still in shock, Blair's murder really destroyed them, especially at their age. They are sceptical about why now?"

"Why now? Because I am pregnant with his child, the timing is kinda taken out of my hands."

"I guess." Ginny reached into her bag and pulled out a sheet of paper and slid it across the table. "I know this seems strange but I was worried that I would forget something so I wrote it down."

"A DNA test?" It was the first thing on the list.

"Yes, I know that sounds harsh but we don't want to go to all this trouble if it's not Blair's baby."

"Sorry…but I've told you it is his baby. Do you think I would put you and your family through something like this if I wasn't sure?" Kim folded up the piece of paper. "I'll read this later. I don't think it's fair to go through this now. Frankly I don't think it's fair at all. I am not a liar. I am not a cruel person, you lost a brother and a son, only a callous cold and calculating person would deliberately inflict more pain. I'm actually offended and hurt."

"We don't know you." Kim reached for her phone. Adam had insisted that she have an out and he was sitting in a car down the block with Rojas. All she had to do was say the word and he'd come get her. Kim was rightly concerned about Adam appearing, not that he cared but he understood how hard it could make things for her if they thought she'd replaced the baby's father already. Not that he was anything other than a friend helping out. Rojas would come get her if she needed it.

"Kim, I'm sorry if this has upset you. This is a unique situation and we don't want to be taken advantage of. We want things to be fair for us." Not once did she mention that they wanted things to be fair for Kim. It was all about them, which she could understand a little but as far as she was concerned this was all about her right now and she was trying to do her best to let people in. It was hard and this was all she had control of right now, her baby and her body and she wasn't letting anyone take that away from her.

"No you are not." Kim snapped. "If you had one shred of decency you'd make the effort to get to know me before you accuse me of trying to manipulate and deceive you. I can't believe this. I am trying to do the right thing."

"I think this all came out wrong."

"You think?" Kim didn't hide her sarcasm. "I appreciate the situation, I really do. Trust me it's not easy for me either and I am still trying to figure things out. Do you think I want to be a single mom, do you think I wanted him dead? We had a relationship so I wanted you to know because it is Blair's baby but make no mistake, I will be making the decisions regarding my pregnancy and birth and my baby. You can be part of it, but on my terms."

"It's not about that."

"Well I wouldn't know would I?" She threw it straight back in Ginny's face. "I do understand that this is a big thing for your family, imagine what it's like for me. My career, my life going forward, raising a child alone and that's what I am focussing on right now."

Kim picked up her phone and checked the time, discreetly hitting send on the SOS message to Adam that she'd typed earlier.

"Look I'm sorry. I need to go; I've got to go to work. I'll be in contact soon, I have another appointment for a scan in a few weeks, I will let you know when if you'd like to come." Kim offered, hoping to soften the blow a little. She didn't want to cut them out, they deserved to be in the baby's life but she didn't want them controlling her either. She wasn't something that needed controlling, she needed people to be there for her, whatever she needed.

"I'd like that."

"Great, I'll send you some dates. It's pretty amazing." Kim softened a little but the list was burning a hole in her.

Ginny nodded. "You know what I find interesting. You've never said you loved my brother or miss him or wish he was here."

Kim was a little stunned, she wasn't expecting to have to answer to her feelings for Blair, they were all over the shop. "We hadn't been together long, I really liked him, love I'm not sure but I can tell you that his child will know what a good ,good man he was and how much he would've loved them. I knew that much about him. He was a good man."

"He was."

"He would have been a good father and I am sorry he's not here to meet his baby." Kim waved as Rojas tapped on the window and indicated that he had to go. "I've gotta go. Thanks for coming out Ginny, I really appreciate it and I hope we can work through all this. I promise I'll take care of this baby. It means the world to me too."

Vanessa fell into step beside Kim as she stepped out of the café and pulled her beanie down tighter over her ears. "How'd you go?"

"Great. Really good." Kim smiled tightly. She liked Vanessa, she had fitted in well and had been very sweet even buying her a little teddy bear one day because she saw it and thought it was cute. She had also organised an old friend of hers, who was starting up a new massage business focussed on Mom's and Bubs to give her three free pre-natal massages. Kim had been feeling tight in her back as her body started to change to accommodate the growing baby. It was perfect and Kim couldn't thank her enough.

Despite that Kim was wary about who she shared things with. It was such a minefield and she relied on just a few people. Adam, Kevin and Trudy were her go to people and she appreciated that everyone cared but it was hard to open up when she didn't understand what she felt most of the time anyway. They were her punching bags and they'd all taken a few hits. It was better this way, to keep her circle tight. That's where she felt safest.

"Burgess, where is my bagel?" Ruzek noticed her mood as soon as she got in the car.

"Sorry. You don't need it anyway; you are getting fat like me."

"I told you, I'm not letting you do this alone. I'm all in."

Vanessa just smiled from the backseat. They were cute together.

Kim had been the beneficiary of the first of Platt's 'chats.'

Platt spent the first twenty minutes of her 'chat' explaining all the ways you can 'not' get pregnant. How thought her wild younger years she had managed the feat with one hundred percent effectiveness. "And yet here we are. A single but not exactly young mother who let's face it doesn't make very smart decisions when it comes to men. Although he was hot, I will give you that and your little milkshake baby will be impossibly cute. But not your smartest move. I know I said go for it but I assumed you'd make sure he wrapped it good and proper."

"Ummm thanks, I think. Although the crack about not being a young mother was probably a tad too much."

"Are you a teenager?"

"No."

"Right, so what's the problem exactly?"

"Nothing."

Trudy hadn't actually been surprised when Kim told her that Adam had been there for her from the start, it had surprised her that he'd kept it a secret but the fact that he was supporting her was no surprise. She had actually scoffed when Kim told her. "Well duh, who else?"

"It's complicated."

"No it's not, you are pregnant, baby daddy is sadly not here, Rest in Peace but the guy who should have always been the one is here. You know, in case you were wondering that was one of your dumb decisions, not talking to him that is. So it's not complicated or rocket science and I would expect nothing less." Platt pulled no punches. "I will, however read him the riot act and I am not afraid of threatening physical violence."

"He's expecting nothing less."

Adam was next on her hit list.

The riot act started with three days of intense stares whenever he walked into the District but he was always too busy to stop and chat often pretending to be talking on the phone when he came through but she was on to him. Then he started coming in the back door and Platt was onto that and ambushed him. "Are you avoiding me?"

"Yes."

"Figures." She grabbed him by the elbow and led him into the gun cage. That was not lost on him. "Now, I will only ask you once. How long are you in this for?"

"No expiration date."

"Because I swear to god I will hurt you if you hurt her again."

He sighed. "Sarge." It was always a little tiresome that he copped all the blame.

"Yes, yes know she was a flake too." She held up her hand to silence his reply. "Doesn't matter now. You and Upton?"

"Dead as a doornail."

"Good. Do what it is you do then."

"What's that."

Platt looked at him like he had two heads. "Love her." Adam smirked at her, knowing full well it would piss her off. "How you remember to breathe some days astounds me."

"Good chat Sarge."

Platt winked at him. "Speaking of which, I will be setting up a Group Chat and you will participate fully."

"Can I invite a friend. Just so there is a trail?"

"Atwater?" she actually snorted.

"Who else?"

"I can make him go away too. Trails are easy to kill, but okay, if that makes you '_feel better'_." The use of air quotes was slightly amusing and definitely terrifying. "Are you going to pick a safe word?" she mocked him.

"We've got this Trudy." Rarely did he call her Trudy, ever since their epically bad 'date' he hadn't dared. But this woman protected her chosen few like a lioness protected her cubs. She'd been there for him when he was jammed up with Antonio and had been rock solid when he scuttled off on an Undercover job because he couldn't work with Burgess. Despite that, she still scared him more than any other woman did, any other person really.

"Yes Adam, we do."

The message group started later that day and Atwater had been bemused and commented that he wasn't sure he wanted to be part of it and he was told, in no uncertain terms that he would be a willing member otherwise Platt would probably kill both of them.

Adam threw his coat over the back of the chair and accepted the beer that Kim handed him. He reached for the piece of paper on the table that had a lot of red markings on it. Kim loved a red marker, he had read pregnancy books that she'd made him study with copious notes and markings. Kevin had to read them as well and it was an ongoing joke between them, while Trudy just kept buying them and feeding Kim's habit. "What's this?"

"It's from Ginny."

"What the fuck?" He read the first two lines. "A DNA test and weekly written updates?" he was pissed. "A one-off payment of $50K in exchange for all medical costs covered at Advocate Christ Hospital and monthly visits to Washington. What the hell is this shit?"

"They are just trying to be involved."

"Involved or to control you? You haven't decided on a hospital yet?"

"I know."

"A Drug test and someone present at the birth?" He spluttered. "What to see if it comes out the right colour?"

"Don't be a dick."

"Why else then? So they can snaffle it and leave the state?"

"I don't know Adam; I was a bit stunned."

"Stunned, I'd be fucking furious, I am fucking furious. They want to pay you off, once they establish paternity of course, but want a say in everything. No fucking way."

"They are the baby's family."

"I don't care, I know you want them involved and to know the kid and I get that but they don't get to control you and your pregnancy Kim." Adam had looked into it. "They don't have that right, or any rights with regards any of this."

"I know."

"What did you say?"

"I only read the first line then told her I'd read it later. I didn't know what to do or say."

"Fuck off would be a good place to start."

"Please don't. Don't make this harder for me than it already is." Her voice wobbled and he felt guilty. He found it hard some days to know where the line was. Sometimes she made it very clear that it wasn't his baby and he had no say whatsoever and other times she would plead with him to help her make a decision.

"Sorry. I'm sorry Kim, I'm just angry, for you." He held out his arms and Kim gratefully accepted his embrace. There had been a lot more of this lately, they'd been getting closer physically. More hugs, falling asleep on the couch together, holding hands. Adam didn't know what Kim wanted, he was too scared to ask or push anything because he knew she'd baulk so he just went with the flow. He kissed her forehead, she loved the forehead kisses, it was his thing and she had felt the change in them. Once they were just supportive and now they were becoming more heartfelt, they lingered and she heard him sigh.

Tilting her head back she looked up at him. "I'm scared."

"I know, I won't let them bully you or hurt you I promise." Adam smiled. "I'll fight 'em."

"Can you?"

"Yep. Chicago's finest ready to serve and protect."

Kim's lips parted a little and he couldn't help himself. He kissed her, softly and when he pulled back a little she chased his mouth. It was sweet and painful and Adam pulled away first. "Sorry."

"No, it's okay. We can't do this."

"Why not?" It wasn't the first time he'd asked her why not when they got close.

"It's too complicated right now Adam, I can't do this as well."

"Okay." He nodded sadly. Kissing her forehead again. "Just so you know…" his words hummed against her warm skin. "…I'm here when it's not so complicated anymore."


	7. Beg, Borrow & Steal

_**Hope this soothes a few ragged edges...**_

"What's this?" Kim shoved a book in his hands. Surely he'd read every pregnancy related book known to man already? She tapped the section angrily. Kim had showered after dinner while Adam did the dishes and he'd finally just sat down. They had been on their feet all day and he'd chased three offenders down laneways and up and down fire stairs. He was shot to bits but they were in this routine and no matter how tired he was they always had dinner on Sunday nights after spending the day together. He had worked today but rather than go home and crash he still stopped by.

"Read it."

He did as he was told and had no idea what to think. Surprisingly there were no red markings on this page. Perhaps she didn't think it was necessary.

"That's where I am at."

He smirked. "And?"

"Adam I need this, I need you to like…." She had no qualms at all while he was freaking out a little. "…take care of me."

"I thought I was."

"No you idiot."

"Like, what?" He narrowed his eyes suggestively. "Sex?"

"Yes, I want to have sex, no I need to have sex, I'm dying here and well, you said you'd support me, whatever I needed and I need to have sex like right now." Kim did not even look slightly embarrassed by this conversation. "I've like tried to you know…" she cocked her head to the side and he was pretty sure he knew what she meant. "…it's not the same."

Even the vision that popped into his head triggered the required reaction in his brain and body. "I'm suddenly feeling a little uncomfortable. Could this be considered sexual harassment?"

"You've wanted me to sexually harass you for years. Stop being a smart ass and you know…" she fluttered her eyes and smiled. "…harass me."

"Is this a good idea? You are…." He didn't get to finish. If one more word had come out of his mouth it was likely he was never having sex again….ever.

It was a roller coaster, how she swung from begging for sex to crying uncontrollably in seconds was a stunning development and one he wasn't expecting. He was worried, he wasn't quite sure if half way through she'd change her mind. Once he was that far down this road it would be hard to turn back.

"You don't want to have sex? You hate that I am pregnant, it repulses you. Because I am fat, my boobs are veiny? What? What is it?" Then came the anger and she reefed the book out of his hands. "What? What is your problem? You've never said no before."

It was like trying to wade through shark infested waters with a slab of raw meat strapped to his limbs.

"I've always wanted to have sex with you. I mean look at me." By glancing down he liked that her eyes followed the direction of his. "Are you sure though?"

"Yes, please. Please?"

"I would've have tried to knock you up a long time ago if I thought it was going to be like this."

"Funny. So?" Without waiting for an answer she climbed into his lap and his body went from mildly excited to ready for action whether he wanted it to or not. "It's just sex Adam."

There was no way he could stop this and he didn't want to either. He missed her, he always enjoyed her. It was hardly romantic though. Kim leapt off his lap and pulled the dress she was wearing over her head. He just watched, her breast were incredible right now, they always had been but now they were something else and then there was the bump. It looked more like a permanent beer belly and now that he had seen the baby for the first time at a recent scan he adored that little bump.

It was amazing, he thought it looked a little weird but the fact it was a real live baby wriggling around in there blew his mind. He'd talked about it for days, explaining to Kevin and Trudy in minute detail about every little thing it was doing. It made Kim feel a little wistful, she could see the joy on his face and at one time this is what she wanted with him. Perhaps she still did and for just a moment she imagined that this was his baby. It was bittersweet when he thanked her for letting him be part of it.

"Come on Adam. What are you doing?"

"Watching you."

"Can you like, do something?" She inclined her head towards his groin.

"I want you to do it." He smiled. "Humour me. I need some foreplay."

"Bullshit. We're done with foreplay." Kim scoffed as she leant forward and unbuckled his belt, taking very little care that she was rubbing her hand against him. Not that it mattered, he was already reacting to her. He started reacting the moment she first asked for sex. No way this genie was going back in the bottle now.

"How do you figure that?"

"I told you I wanted to have sex, that always worked in the past."

"I think you are incredible; you amaze me and I'm so proud of you."

"See now you are full mast…so?" She kissed him hard while she struggled to get his jeans down over his hips. He was holding her steady. Hooking his thumbs under the waist band of her panties and pushed them down and Kim stepped out of them before she climbed back into his lap, her knees either side of his hips and she didn't waste any time.

His eyes closed for a moment as he let the sensation wash through him. He felt calm. Kim rocked against him. "Are you okay? I'm not hurting you?" He whispered in her ear.

"No, god no….Adam." she moaned. "Adam."

"Do what you've gotta do."

She eventually rested her head on his shoulder when she stopped shaking and enjoyed the gentle pressure of his hands running up and down her back. "Just so you know." He brushed the hair that had fallen over her shoulder back and kissed her cheek. "It's never been just sex with you."

Feeling her shiver he grabbed a blanket off the back of her couch and wrapped her up in it and for a few moments they stayed in silence. "Why don't you go get into bed. You're getting cold."

"Are you leaving?"

"Not until you are asleep." The warm trickle of tears on his neck gutted him. "Please don't cry Kim."

"I don't want you to go."

"I know, but you know I can't stay."

"Why?"

"Because if I stay tonight I will never leave."

"Okay, then stay."

"Hey." He gently pushed on her shoulders so that she had to look at him. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Giving me a moment of peace." That's what it felt like for him, he felt peaceful and at ease with himself and it had been a long time since he'd felt like that. His life had been in turmoil for so long, with Al dying, Antonio and his issues, his own issues with an ill-thought out fling and now with trying to be the best person he could be for someone he loved who was going through the biggest thing she had ever faced had taken its toll on him and this brief moment had made all that fade a little bit.

"Can you please stay a while? Please?"

"Only if you get into bed. You need to sleep and I need to watch you sleep."

"That's a bit creepy." Kim climbed off his lap and hunted around for her underwear.

"Calms my mind." Adam reached for her hand once she was partially dressed again. "Hey come here a minute." She stepped closer to him and he rested his hand on her swollen belly. "Sorry about all that little Bean." He leant forward and kissed it softly. "You are one lucky little Bean, you've got the best Momma in the world looking out for you and FYI, Uncle Adam, he's awesome too. Let's get Momma to bed."

Laying down next to Kim he pulled the covers up and draped one arm over her. "Thank you Adam."

"My pleasure." He smiled. "Just one request? Next time you get the urge or surge or whatever that was can you make sure it's not when Kev is here."

"Don't be stupid."

"Please call me….anytime, day or night."

"I will."

"So you think you'll get the urge again anytime soon?"

"Hmmm, perhaps." Kim rolled over to face him and despite her being under the covers and him being on top of them she managed to get close and snuggle into him. It felt nice to be in someone's arms again, or more specifically his arms. This was always her home, despite them being so far apart for so long. "Is there a code word you want me to use?"

"Donut."

"You and bloody donuts." He'd eat them for breakfast lunch and dinner given the chance.

Adam chuckled. "Yep."

"Hey Adam?" Kim smiled in the dark. "I have an urge for a Donut."

He stayed until the sun came up and it was the best night's sleep he'd had a long, long time.


	8. Who's Adam?

Kim waited nervously outside the Doctor's office. Ginny had texted her to say her plane had landed a few minutes late and she was on her way. Kim had invited her to come to a scan, she was trying her best to give Blair's family as much as information so they felt included but she wasn't giving them control or the say in decisions. It was her baby and her pregnancy and she was doing it her way.

"Kim." Ginny leapt out of the cab. "I'm so sorry I'm late. Oh my…" she stepped back a little. "…can I?" Ginny nodded towards her bump. The last time she saw Kim she wasn't showing and now there was a definite baby bump. Three months was a lot of growth.

"Sure." Not that Kim loved people touching her stomach. Adam, Kev, Trudy and Voight were given free reign but everyone else it depended on her mood. Although she had ripped Adam a new one recently when he'd started playing with it and she was in a foul mood and didn't want to be touched.

Ginny laid both hands on her neat little baby belly. "I can't believe part of Blair is still here."

"I know, it's kinda sweet though. Bittersweet."

"It is."

"Are you well?"

"I am, we are both well." Kim ushered her inside. Scans were nerve wracking enough, she was always worried they'd find something wrong so having Blair's sister with her made it ten times worse.

"Okay Kim, let's see how little Bob is going?" Jackie, the sonographer lifted her gown and squeezed some cold gel onto her stomach.

"Bob?" Ginny raised one eyebrow.

"Baby of Burgess." Gillian responded. "No Adam today?"

"No, this is Aunt Ginny. Blair was her brother." Kim felt Ginny stiffen beside her. They had made it very clear from the start what the situation was to the clinic.

"Oh, Mary will be sad, Adam flirting with her is the highlight of her day, she skipped into work today because she knew you were coming." Adam couldn't help himself, he always flirted with the elderly receptionist. The smile that lit up her face when Adam came with her was sweet. Her husband had died a few years prior and she was lonely and Adam brighten her life a little.

"So everything looks good?" She changed the subject.

"So far." Jackie pointed out the baby to Ginny, the head, arms, legs and heartbeat. "Good strong heart beat that's what we like to hear." She took some measurements as she talked.

"Can you see what it is?" Ginny peered at the screen.

"We haven't looked." Jackie continued with her task.

"Can you?"

"No." Kim jumped in. "I don't want to know."

"Why not? It would make it so much easier to pick names, buy clothes, decorate the nursery. How can you wait?"

"I like the idea of being surprised. I don't want to know."

"Maybe Jackie? Jackie is it?" Ginny doubled checked her name. "Can just write it on a piece of paper and slip it to me. I promise to keep it a secret."

"No." Kim was adamant.

"Sorry." Jackie could sense the tension building between the two of them. "Not without Kim's permission."

Ginny looked annoyed. Kim had struggled with her ever since the day they met. She had pushed back on most of her demands although she did agree to the DNA test once the baby was born. That was more out of spite because she knew who the father was and she had every intention of reminding them of that when the test showed Blair as the father.

Adam had been pissed with that and Kevin had backed him up. "Okay, I get it." Kim snapped at them both when they were discussing it ad nauseum. "Look, I feel like being petty okay? I know this is Blair's baby so the thought of being able to say 'I told you so' was an opportunity too good to pass up."

"So this is about being petty?"

"Yes. If they want to play games, I can play games too." Kim smiled at their shocked looks and they changed their tunes and were all for it. They were bloody children some days.

She agreed to let Ginny know when she was in labour if possible. Kim refused to take any money from them, she wasn't sure if she was being bought or bought off. She didn't want their money; she was doing this on her own and she wouldn't be dictated too about how to raise her child. She did promise to bring the baby out to Washington to meet Blair's elderly parents once they were old enough to fly. Until they were vaccinated she wasn't getting on a plane with god knows what germs.

She had also accepted their offer to buy the furniture for the nursery, although she chose it. They wanted to set up a trust fund, once paternity was established of course and Kim agreed as long as it was a college fund that she wouldn't access, there was no way they were accusing her of taking money from them and giving them nothing in return.

After the appointment they found a small café nearby and sat down for some lunch. Ginny was delighted that they gave her a copy of the scan, she was going to take it to a friend back in Washington to see if they could tell her if it was a boy or girl. She was going to be disappointed though, Jackie had made sure in the two pictures that there was no way it could be discovered. She hadn't come down in the last shower, they saw this type of thing all the time.

"So, can I ask who is Adam?"

Kim was expecting it, she saw her stiffen when Jackie asked and then again when Mary gushed about him as the paid the bill. "Adam is my best friend. Along with Kevin and Trudy, they are my three support people."

"Oh. I thought it sounded like a bit more than that?"

"When I found out I was pregnant I had called in sick because I thought I had food Poisoning, my boss had sent Adam over to check that I was okay, I never call out sick and that's when I took the test. He's been a great friend, he's a good guy. Kev has been my partner at work for years and Trudy is my old desk sargent and kinda just decided that she was the mother hen. I don't have a strong relationship with my own family, so they are my family."

"Oh okay."

"I can't do this alone."

"I understand. I just got a vibe that's all."

"Blair is not here anymore, he can't be here, he will never be here again." Kim responded bluntly. Adam was in her life again and right now they were happy with what they had but it was between them and no one else. It was awkward and challenging to navigate and they were trying to give each other the space to work out where they wanted it to go. The facts were though that she was having another man's baby, a man who wasn't around and never would be and she had always loved Adam. How that looked in the future they had no idea but right now he was supporting her, physically and emotionally and comforting her and they were happy.

"Can I meet him?"

"Why?"

"He's going to be in my niece or nephews life."

"As are a lot of other people."

"You seem defensive?"

"Do you blame me? You've done nothing so far but try and control everything. I am not something you can control. It's my baby. Not yours." Kim had been pushed far enough. She wasn't a push over; she never had been but her time in Intelligence had given her a backbone that she'd never had before combined with her innate mothering instincts it was a force to be reckoned with.

"Sorry Kim, it's just…" It was the first show of emotion in Ginny, she had been very reserved so far, at times Kim found her calculating and didn't particularly trust her. "It's my brother's baby and he's not here and I miss him."

"I wish he was here to meet his baby too."

Adam was more than happy to meet Ginny but Kim wasn't so sure. He was bound to say something, he had pretty strong opinions on how much Blair's family were trying to muscle in and control Kim. She also invited Kevin and Trudy as a bit of a buffer for Adam and to keep him in control, if anyone could do that it was Kevin and Trudy and if Ginny wanted to meet the people in this baby's life then she could meet all three of them.

"I promise to be on my best behaviour. I will pull out all my charms."

"Please don't. Your charms are what got me into this mess."

"Huh?"

"Jackie and Mary at the clinic were all gaga over you and wondering where you were. Mary in particular was devastated that you weren't there to flirt with her."

"At least someone appreciates my efforts." He winked at her as he filled his coffee cup in the break room. "When and where?"

"Tonight. I'll text you the address."

"Do you want me to pick you up?"

"What? No." Adam chuckled at her hysterical response. "I don't want her to think that we are like…"

"Like what? Eating Donuts?" He laughed a little wickedly.

"You wish."

"Donuts…my favourite food." They were fooling themselves that whatever they had going on was friends with benefits when it was rapidly becoming so much more than that and Adam knew he had to bide his time until she was ready to admit it. He'd like it to happen sooner rather than later but understood it may not be until well after the baby was born that she was in a position to move forward. Being in her life was enough for him now.

Trudy was almost giddy with excitement. Ginny was pretty sure of herself as she walked towards the table. Adam and Kevin were running late, they'd picked up a late arrest and needed to finish the interview and charge sheets. Adam had assured her that they were on their way.

"Well it's nice to finally meet you Ginny." Trudy indicated that she should sit next to her. "I've been waiting for this all day. I have so many questions."

"Oh… Thank you Trudy." Ginny smiled stiffly and Kim tried to hide hers. Ginny had no idea what she'd just walked in to. "Just us girls?"

"No, Kevin and Adam had to finish up something at work, they are on their way."

"So wine?" Platt eyeballed the waiter to bring the wine list. "Tell me about yourself Ginny?"

Adam and Kevin made it to the restaurant just as Trudy was hitting her stride. She had asked a dozen questions, barely letting the poor woman get a word in. "Ah, here is dumb and dumber." Trudy snarked and took a quick look at Ginny who looked a little bit excited to see them walking towards them. Turdy got it though, she was hoping that Adam was Kevin. "We've got the black man covered. Don't you worry your pretty little head about that."

"I'm not worried."

"Good because they are two of the best men you could ever meet. If I had a child, heaven forbid, I'd want them in my kid's corner."

Kim introduced both Adam and Kevin and even Platt was surprised when Adam let Kevin take the chair next to Kim, he rarely let her stray too far from his side lately. She had her suspicions of what they were up to, actually she knew what they were up to but they both shut her down completely and as long as they were happy she wasn't going to rock the boat.

Kevin rubbed her belly. "How's Bean?"

"Good, starving so let's order." Kim slapped his hand away playfully.

"Bean?" Ginny looked amused.

"Yep, first time I saw it it looked like a Bean. So it's our Bean." Kevin announced proudly. He adored this little thing.

"I thought it was Bob?"

"No that's what Jackie calls it, technically when I am in hospital it will be Baby of Burgess." Kim interrupted their conversation.

"So Trudy's been running through some questions? What's she up to? Ten or Twenty." Adam topped up their wine glasses before pouring himself one. It was always funny watching Kevin drink wine, he didn't love it but knew he had to pretend to be classy every now and then.

"Feels more like fifty to be honest."

"I know the feeling. To can be rough but if you hang on it does get better. If she suggests a What's Ap group chat, pretend you don't know what it is."

"We were having such a lovely dinner until you showed up." Trudy snipped. "I'm sure Ginny has some questions for you two muppets."

It wasn't as bad as Kim was fearing. Adam, Kevin and Trudy managed to make Ginny laugh hysterically and Kev flirted up a storm while Adam sat back and watched it all unfold. He was still wary about what Ginny really wanted from Kim, he wanted to know what her game was. He couldn't turn off his cop brain, not when the stakes were so high. Was she ceding territory to strike from another angle or on another day or was she genuinely happy that Kim was well supported.

Not being blessed with a lot of smarts as far as women are concerned he was proud of himself when he realised that Kim didn't need him to swoop in and be her knight in shining armour right now, he'd already done that by showing up for her every day. Trudy was doing enough 'knighting' for both of them.

"I am so full." Kim stretched in her seat. "The Bean is certainly letting me know now when there is no more room." It was also her subtle way of telling them that she was ready to wrap this night up. While it had been smooth she knew the longer it went on the more likely that things would slip off the rails. She didn't have the energy for that right now.

"You look tired?" Adam offered, he knew Kim wanted an out and he would be happy to get out of here as well. He was keen to know how Kim felt the night went and what she thought about Ginny's behaviour.

"I am tired. This is way past my bedtime lately and I've usually slept for two hours on the couch by now." She turned to Trudy. "Do you mind if we leave soon?"

"What no dessert?" She was most miffed at the thought of missing out.

"No, you told me before we got here not to let you have any either. So I am doing you a solid." Kim shrugged. "Anyway I have donuts at home I can eat later, when I wake up and 2am to pee and am starving."

Kim did look a little nervous when the boys and Ginny didn't make a move to leave when they did. Ginny decided she wanted a coffee and they agreed to join her. "So?" She waited to the coffee was in front of her. "Adam. What's going on?"

"Well Kim's pregnant, the father isn't here unfortunately and Kim needs support. It's been a rough few months for her, this is a lot to deal with on her own so I stepped up, Kev stepped and Trudy, well she does whatever the hell she wants. Rest assured our priority is Kim and this baby."

"Okay, are you going to be with her at the birth?"

"One of us will be, Kim hasn't decided who yet. That's up to her."

"I think she has decided to be honest."

"Then you know more than us." He wasn't getting drawn into this and Kev could sense how tense it was getting. "If you are worried Kim will be alone, she won't be."

"Oh I know she won't."

He exhaled slowly. "Do you have a problem with people who have loved Kim for a long time, who have been in her life for a long time supporting her at a time when her whole world has shifted on its axis? If Blair was here, would you have a problem with him being there?"

"He's the father."

"Yes he is, Kim knows that, Kev knows that, I know that but he's not here, he will never be here so this is where we are at. It is what it is."

"Kim has baulked at every offer of help."

"Demanding a DNA test, offering to pay for her medical expenses in exchange for you choosing her hospital, demanding she bring the baby out to Washington every month and drug testing isn't helping, it is trying to control her."

"Seems like nothing is secret?"

"Nope." Adam replied calmly, even if on the inside he was raging.

"Hey…" Kev interrupted. "…we get your concern and your want to be involved but Kim is doing a great job, she's dealing with the pregnancy the best way she knows how. It's her body and her baby and it seems you might just be forgetting that. This is not a surrogate situation; this is not suddenly your baby because your brother is the father. She is the mother and she will do whatever is best for her and the baby. She's not a crackhead, she's a smart, strong, intelligent, caring, beautiful woman and will be an incredible mother to your niece or nephew. You can either embrace it or get out of her way." Kevin had lost all of his flirtiness. "I won't stand by and watch you bully her."

"I'm not being a bully."

"No?" He looked bemused. "Seems like you are trying. She didn't have to tell you, she wants nothin' from you except for her baby to have a family. She's got us but she knows her baby deserves to know your family too."

"We just miss Blair."

"Yep, got that. This baby isn't Blair, it's not a replacement for your brother. It's a baby, who needs to be loved and surrounded by people and family. You on board?"

Ginny took a moment to take it all in. She looked at both of them, Adam's gaze was steady and uncompromising. She imagined that this was an interrogation to some degree and she had under estimated how this night was going to go, she went in thinking she held all the aces but she was put firmly back in her place. The thing that shocked her the most was that she couldn't hate them, they were protective but that wasn't a bad thing.

"On board." She nodded.

"Awesome. Aunt Ginny has a cute ring to it." Atwater found his flirt again. The way he could switch it on and off was impressive.

Kevin was keen to hit up a bar afterwards, the night was still young but Adam had places to be. "Dude, this disappearing thing you do is getting old or obvious."

"Ask no questions Bro and I'll tell no lies." Adam shrugged. "I'm whacked, it's almost eleven and we've got that interview to do tomorrow morning, it's gonna take a while, I can feel it and being stuck in that tiny room with a guy who already smelt like three day old socks and you is bad enough without a hangover. I promise Friday night, you and me Bro on the turps."

Kim was already in bed when he let himself in. "You took your time." She muttered sleepily as he climbed into bed beside her.

"Bloody Atwater, wanted to hit the tiles." His kissed the back of her neck.

"You could've."

"Yes, I could've but I didn't want to. I came for my donut."

Kim rolled over onto her back and Adam propped himself up on one elbow and slid her hand under the covers to play with her stomach. "How was Bean looking today?"

"Good, all arms and legs accounted for, losing a bit more of that alien look."

"Good job Momma Bear." Adam was quiet for a few moments while he moved his hand around, not strictly staying on her stomach, he liked to roam.

"Do you think Ginny is on the straight up?"

"Not sure." He had always tried to be honest with her about Blair's family. She was a little blinded and felt guilty that he wasn't here and had moments when she felt that she had to make it up to them. It wasn't her fault that Blair was murdered, but that didn't stop her doubts. Sometimes he went too far but they agreed that he'd say what he thought and Kim would tell him if he went too far and when to back off. It worked, most of the time. "Kev certainly put her in her box." He had the feeling that Ginny would be happy to dish the dirt on them given half the chance. "Reminded her that you were the baby's mother, not a surrogate and that you weren't going to be bullied by her or her family."

"How'd that go down?"

"Like a lead balloon but I think she needed to hear it. It's all good…I think."

"Guess I'll find out soon enough." Kim kissed his cheek. "Thank you for coming. I know she was testing me. I appreciated you not going alpha male."

"I'm learning how not to be a dick."

Kim chuckled. "About that…."

Adam grabbed her hand and stopped it's slow progression down his body, for a brief moment anyway. "Hey Ginny asked about the birth, who was going to be with you and…."

"You."

"Okay."

"That's if you want to be there, I know it's a lot to ask and it's not going to be pretty and I don't want Platt to see my bits and well you've seen my bits, Atwater hasn't either FYI and I am okay with that. I may hate you though because I can't hate anyone else but…"

He let her go for a little while before placing his index finger over her mouth to stop her ramble. "I'll be there."

"Yeah?"

"Yes, on one condition?"

"What's that?"

"It'll cost you."

"Let me guess?" Kim pushed him onto his back forcefully and scrambled on top. "A donut?" He really was in heaven lately. He had jokingly told her that he was going to get fat if he kept eating donuts all the time and Kim had laughed.

"I'd prefer it if you bought the whole dozen."


	9. Burgess and the Bean

Kim had doubts, a lot of doubts and she was nervous.

The impending birth wasn't quite as nerve wracking as the baby shower. Adam, Kevin and Trudy had insisted on throwing her a baby shower and it was being planned with military precision, with a side of total chaos.

Trudy had the precision and Adam and Kevin bought the chaos.

It had started with the cake and gone steadily downhill from there. They had decided to make it themselves or at least Adam had snatched it and decided, which was utter madness. Having gone to order one from the local bakery and had been astonished by the price, it was ridiculous to pay that much for a bit of cake and some icing but that as Trudy reminded them, it was for Burgess and the Bean.

Then the argument started about the gender. Kim still hadn't found out, much to Adam's chagrin, he ribbed her about it constantly. He was impatient, he wanted to know but unlike Blair's sister who had tried to get the sonographer to tell her on the sly, even calling the clinic to ask for better scans when she was told the ones she had were inconclusive he had accepted that they were in for a surprise on the day. Kim had been furious when she found out what Ginny had done and had called her to blast her. He was proud of her that day, it was a real Momma Bear moment.

Kevin's mother had some old wives tales about how to tell and Kev was constantly doing all sorts of weird shit to pinpoint if it was a boy or a girl. The 'tests' showed something different every day, people put their hands on her stomach to try and 'get a vibe' and then there were the constant discussions on whether she was carrying high or low, in the back or at the front. What amused Kim the most was they had no idea what they were talking about but boy did they talk about it. She'd spent a whole dinner with both of them arguing over whether it was a boy or girl, they decided it was like a court case, each mounted their own case for what it should be. It was hilarious.

They were both opposite. Kevin was all boy and Adam was on the girl train. Kim did suspect that it was deliberate. If they were both the same what the hell would they argue about incessantly and annoy the crap out of her. They were funny, they made her laugh constantly with their crazy antics and conversations.

Adam was annoyed with the girl at the bakery who was surprised that they didn't know what the baby was because _'everyone did these days. It's almost old fashioned not to know'_ and then asked if they wanted _'two Dads on top with a baby'_. "What?" Adam spluttered.

"Now, now Adsy. I'm sure she's seen it all before." Kevin draped his arm around his shoulder and Adam couldn't have moved any quicker if he had tried when Atwater tried to plant a kiss on his cheek. He was now annoyed with Kevin as well as the girl behind the counter.

"Get the fuck off me." He growled under his breath. "It's not our baby." He reliably informed the sales assistant. "My girlfriend is having a baby."

"Girlfriend?" Atwater whistled. "Since when."

"Forget it." Adam shoved his hands in his pockets, a sure sign he was pissed off, it was one of his tells. "We'll make our own cake." He stormed out of the store and left Kevin to trail behind looking more confused than ever. He gave the sales assistant an apologetic smile as they left.

He said nothing until they got into the car. "Ahh, Ruze….girlfriend?" Atwater lifted one eyebrow. "Something you haven't told me. You told me I'd be the first to know."

"Drop it Kev, it was just to get that bird off my back. The thought of two Dads creeped me out."

"You really need to loosen up. It's a beautiful thing."

Adam just mumbled something unintelligible and Kev knew better to push it. "And soooo what's this about making a cake ourselves."

"How hard can it be?"

"Dude, you can't cook."

"I've learnt a lot lately." Adam pulled out into traffic. "Anyway I am not paying 90 bucks for a cake that nobody will eat because you know, it's got sugar in it." Half the squad seemed to be on a health kick at the moment. It was like a morgue in there at meal times. Halstead had been an unwilling partner; Rojas had been bringing him green juices every morning and they had sourced sugar free cookies for the breakroom. He swore both Voight and Halstead were raiding the stash of gummy bears he had in his desk, every time he went to grab some the packet was half empty.

"We could make it sugar free,"

"Fuck no. Burgess and the Bean need sugar; she'd rip my fucking….." he paused briefly catching himself before he slipped up. "….head off. Those two need sugar to survive, I need them to have sugar so I'll survive." This was about Kim; he wasn't catering for other people's fads.

"You make it sound rough?" Atwater drummed his fingers on the edge of the door. "And very domestic."

Ruzek declined to answer, he asked instead what the address was of the next place they were tracking down. Trudy had sent them on a cross town journey to pick up the invites that she had 'spent hours' putting together and while they were out apparently there was a very cute shop that had very expensive bamboo sheets for the baby's crib that she had decided that Intelligence were buying for 'the Bean'. Her last words to them was "I do not want to hear you couldn't find them. If I do I can tell you what people won't be able to find and that is your bodies."

"Platt is taking this to the next level isn't she?" Atwater grumbled.

"There is no level, we are in unchartered waters my friend." The group chat which consisted of Platt and them had been going strong and 99% of the messages were from her. All they got to do was say 'yes'…no was not an option. They were both amused that Platt had labelled the group _'The Awesome Aunt & the Average Uncles.'_

Burgess had begged Adam to tell him what she had planned for the Baby shower, claiming she didn't like surprises, which he pointed out was a lie because she was keeping the gender a surprise. That went down well but at the end of it all the level of fear for his own life from Platt's threats far outweighed anything that Burgess bought to bear.

The news that the boys were going to make the cake was not well received….at all. Words came out of her mouth that even made Adam and Kevin blush and the few random patrol officers within earshot scuttle away like rats from a sinking ship and with tails between their legs Adam and Kev hightailed it upstairs while she angrily punched in the numbers of local bakeries to order a cake. Even when they left that night the daggers she threw as they departed the building were astonishing and the barrage of messages on their group chat was relentless. By the next day she was over it, but it had been a rough few hours.

Kim had loved every minute of it. Platt had told them it was a high tea and that they needed to wear suits and seeing her boys dressed in suits was hysterical particularly because Platt had told everyone else that it was a rock 'n' roll theme. It had to be 'Burgess and the Bean' just sounded like a rock 'n' roll band and even though Kevin had suggested it he was instantly shot down and then she preceded to organise it without their knowledge. The looks on their faces when they arrived was priceless. They looked so good and Adam especially. He wore his blue suit, one of her favourite but she only had a few moments to talk to him alone. "You look good."

"I'm going to kill Platt later."

"When I saw you walk in I knew this was all her. I like it though."

"Yeah?"

"Just don't get it dirty."

"What if I drop donut crumbs on it."

"Well that's okay." She smiled and rested one hand on her now protruding belly, there wasn't a lot of room left. "Bean is kicking up a storm today."

"Good Girl."

"Or boy?"

"She told me when I was talking to her the other night while you were asleep." He laughed and rested his hand where she told him and felt the sharp kick. "See, she agrees."

"You are an idiot."

"And very loveable." His smirk was maddening. They hadn't uttered those words but they danced around them and close to the edge several times. They said everything but those three words and sometimes words didn't matter, actions did. There was a lot of love in every moment they spent together. They just avoided the hard conversation, it had to happen but when it happened was yet to be determined and they liked what they had going on so why rock the boat?

It was a unique situation, one they never imagined either of them would be in but here they were and they had to figure out how it was going to work. One fact would never change, Kim was having a baby that wasn't Adam's and that was a big thing for him to deal with. How it looked going forward was a little uncertain still so they took things one day at a time.

Platt had also organised a onesie decorating station, a 'guess how many pacifiers in the jar' game, pin the diaper on the baby blindfold game, pinata's and there was of course the obligatory 'pick the time, date, sex, & weight' of the baby pool. The pass the parcel was hilarious with each layer containing a suggested name….which it took them three rounds to figure out they were all Trudy.

Adam and Kevin packed up all her gifts and hauled them home. Her small apartment was overflowing. "I mean this thing is tiny and it's got more shit than you have." Kevin muttered, bringing up the third lot of gifts from his car. It was true, Adam lived sparsely.

Kev had commented a few times at Adam's things being left around Kim's apartment, it was just the odd thing, a jacket, a pair of shoes, a t-shirt and Kim was often wearing one of his hoodies claiming hers didn't fit her as well as Adam's did and she couldn't afford to buy a whole new wardrobe for a couple of months of use. They both just smiled and he knew that they had something going on but if they weren't ready to tell him then he had to be content that they were at least happy. That's all he wanted for them, happiness, together of course but he needed them happy. If they could get themselves together there was hope for him.

"It's insane isn't it. And the amount of research that goes into every purchase is crazy."

Kim had spent several days going back and forth on the crib. She'd emailed people, read on line reviews, reached out to mother's groups online for advice, hauled him around to half a dozen shops and then shot down every one of his suggestions. In the end he figured out that if he really hated something to say he liked it because Kim would scoff and tell him he had no idea and no taste.

He did snort when she told the cashier, when she finally decided on the right crib which cost twice as much as his bed had, that she wasn't going to pay for assembly because Adam, Kev and Jay were quite capable. "Uhhhh, have you met us? This is way out of our skill set."

It had been an entertaining afternoon for her and as soon as Platt got wind of the plan she was over, bottle of wine in front of her and provided running commentary on the ineptness on display. "Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you. Keystone Cops."

It wasn't just the crib; it was a chest of drawers and change table as well and it took them six hours. At the four hour mark the bourbon shots came out and it was a steady decline which at the end had Kim angrily declaring that she was not letting her child sleep in the slightly wonky crib.

Adam demanded money from Jay and Kevin to pay for a professional to come in and fix their disastrous attempts at furniture building. Reluctantly they handed it over the cash and he organised someone to come in while Kim was away for the weekend. She was slowly re-building her relationship with her sister and Nicole had invited her to stay for the weekend. Adam could see how happy that made her and while she was away a far more talented man came in and rebuilt the furniture.

Crisis averted and Kim was delighted and had learnt her lesson. Adam, Kevin and Jay were not to be trusted with flat pack furniture but she was seriously concerned about whether she could trust them with her baby either.

"I've learned my lesson." She hooked her arms around his neck and cuddled him from behind as they looked at the completed crib.

"What's that?" He grabbed her hands and rubbed them lightly. He'd missed her this weekend but was glad she seemed to have a nice time and she had come home with some baby things that Nicole had given her, including a few things that she had kept from when she had Zoe.

"You can't build things for shit." Adam scoffed, it was not new, he'd told her this. "And you are really, really sweet."

"Like a donut?" Kim tried to pull her arms away but Adam had a tight hold on them. "You really feel like a Donut don't you?"

"No."

"No? Come on. We need to get used to it being in here. Consider it training."

"Oh, you are such a…."

"Donut lover…I love Donuts." Almost, he almost said it.


	10. The Difference between Loves

Adam was sitting at the small kitchen table in Kim's apartment. She had left work early today and Adam hadn't seen her since the previous afternoon. He'd been out all day at a crime scene and they had been on a late night raid last night so apart from a few messages to let her know he was okay and his usual morning check in they hadn't caught up.

"Before I say what I want to say I just want you to know I will absolutely be this person for you." He tapped the sheet in front of him. It was a check list that the hospital had given her about the role of the birth support person and Adam was reading through it. She had a walk-through of the hospital today and an appointment with the midwife to go through her birth plan and how admissions would work. The paperwork she had filled out had listed Adam as her support person and he had been a little put out that she listed him as her 'friend' but it was what it was. Perhaps it was time to force her to admit that it was more than that.

Kim seemed really happy with the hospital and the midwives and it had eased her mind a little. Deciding how and what she wanted for her birth had been a long fraught process but she got there in the end. One thing that never changed was who she wanted with her.

"But….I don't just want to be your birth support person or friend.." He pointed to the paper. "Kim, I want to be your person."

"Wow."

"I know, probably not the right time but whatever. It's out there, do with it what you will."

"Wow." She stood mouth agape and stared at him from the kitchen.

"Yep."

"Well, yes. I think we should sit down and talk about how you being my person might look like."

"Really?" he was expecting more of a pushback. Up until now she had told him repeatedly that what they had was enough, it was just friends with benefits and that was all it could be right now. It was the 'right now' that he got tired of, he didn't want that anymore.

"Yes. It's not as easy as it once was."

"Nothing is as easy as it once was, we've changed, grown as people. I feel like we were kids back then, wide-eyed and hopeful. Things were just supposed to happen and we'd be happy. Life isn't like that I know that now and I know what I want and that I have to work hard and not just let things happen. I can do this and I want to do this with you."

"Okay Adam. What I do know is that from day one you've been here, when I probably didn't deserve it and I look forward to everyday with you in it." Kim finally smiled at him. "I like the sound of you being my person too."

That was the easy part.

Working out what it exactly looked like was going to be the hardest part and they did decide that they wanted to live together first and foremost. There was the small issue of a newborn baby to take into account however and Kim's place wasn't big enough for all of them, it was a one bedroom place and the baby would be sleeping in Kim's room. She had decided to stay put until after it was born, she just couldn't face moving but there wasn't enough room for three of them.

Another thing Kim worried about was telling Blair's family. She didn't know whether she should, what difference would it make? Blair wasn't here, he was dead and apart from the DNA and the photo's that Kim had of him all this child had was the image of a father who never knew they existed. However there was the opportunity to have Dad, someone to love them, guide them, protect them and help them grow into the man it's father would want it to be.

Was it too soon though? Should she be thinking about this when she was emotional and hormonal and about to give birth? Was she just doing it because she was scared of being alone with the baby?

On the other hand, there was Adam and there was always something undeniable between them and why should she ignore how she felt about Adam to appease other people when she knew she was happiest when she was with him?

And then he told her he loved her.

She'd been shitty with him for some reason, he couldn't even remember what it was half way through her rant but it had been and epic one and she wasn't slowing down. "And…another thing…."

Adam jumped in when Kim drew breath. "I love you, I'm in love with you, I want us to be a family. All three of us, together."

"What?"

"I love you."

"Why now?" Kim felt flustered and his confession caught her off guard.

"Why not, you are beautiful and amazing and I'm looking at you and I don't want to hold it in anymore or hide it or pretend it's not real. I love you. That's it."

"Adam."

"That's it, I don't need you to say anything." He held up his hand. "I just needed to say it."

"Are you done?"

"Yes. You can continue." He waved his hand giving her permission to keep talking. He knew he'd thrown her off by interrupting and he also knew she had to finish otherwise she couldn't process. It was how her mind worked lately. One thing at a time.

"Fine…" she resumed her rant without missing a beat which he found amusing. "and…one final thing…" she finished her very detailed description of the latest bad habit that had annoyed her with an entertaining flourish of handwaving. "…I love you too. I always have, but there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone."

"Sure." He felt his heart breaking and Kim could see it written all over his face.

"Adam, I am in love with you. Completely, all of it, Love, in love."

"Right. That's Awesome."

"It is right? This is good isn't it, it's okay? I mean people will be happy for us right?"

"Darlin' they already are." He had called her Darlin' several times over the last few weeks and it melted her every time. "Come here?"

Pulling her into his arms the kiss suddenly felt like it always should have been, it felt real.

Quietly they decided to look for a more suitable place to live. It didn't matter if it was before the baby was born or after. This is where it started to go pear shaped previously, well one of the many reasons so Adam was keen to make sure she knew he was putting in the effort. He was constantly sending her links to places that he thought they should check out. It was sweet the way he always mentioned whether it was suitable for not only them but also a baby. '_There is an office right next door to the bedroom that we could convert to a nursery.' _Or '_This places has three bedrooms, ours, Bean's and Ginny when she comes to stay or your family.'_ He would also point out places that had small gardens so Bean had a place to run around.

Kim's emotions swung wildly and she begged Adam to hang on for the long haul. Everyone told her it was just her hormones but it was more than that, some days it felt like a burden. She worried about what the future held for her child. This wasn't just a baby, for one family it was keeping their son and brother alive and for Kim it was building a family that was completely different to the one she often dreamed of. There were times she felt like she was doing it alone, that while she had the support of friends and they were her 'family' not having that person beside had frightened her. Now Adam was there and once she realised it wasn't just because of the baby the knot of tension inside her released and letting him all the way in felt good, it felt like a relief and it felt right.

Work had stretched her some days. While it wasn't what she was used to some days she barely sat down and by the end she just wanted to go on Maternity Leave. In the beginning she had planned to work up to a week before her due date, her job wasn't arduous or physical and rather than give up completely they negotiated reduced hours. She would cut back to three days a week and only from 10 until 3pm. But towards the end of the pregnancy she got too uncomfortable and finished up two weeks earlier than planned.

It was only once they had found a new place and signed the lease that they clued everyone else in on their plans. Kevin and Trudy knew of course, they couldn't hide anything from them but everyone else was either clueless or chose to be.

"Well colour me shocked." Halstead roared with laughter. "He's been way too happy for the past few months. It's about time."

"Yeah yeah." A smile lit up Adam's face. "What can I say? A content man is a happy man." Adam was seriously happier than he'd been in a long time. He'd had some really tough moments lately and the baby aside, because that at times was hard to reconcile, being with Kim was worth every one of them. He appreciated her more now than he ever did and he knew she felt the same. They weren't ready for each other before and maybe they weren't quite ready for each other now but their hand had been forced and now they were mature enough to work through it rather than take the easy option of giving up on each other.

Halstead bought him a beer and toasted his buddy. "It's been a long time coming."

"Yep. Three years in the making, slightly unconventional way to become a family but we are really, really happy. We can't wait to meet the Bean and be a family."

"I'm proud of you Bro, you've always had the heart of a Lion. You know who would be proud of you? Al. Man he'd be number one on the grandparent train and he'd be your biggest cheerleader."

"Thanks Halstead. Means a lot."

"Burgess and the Bean are lucky. You are lucky. You've cracked the code."

"The Code."

"Life, love and family."


	11. Just the Start

"How was Burgess this morning?" Atwater weaved in and out of the traffic. They were on their way to execute a search warrant and it wasn't going to be a fun one. Well not fun in regards to easy, but they did like the thrill of a bit of action because these idiots always made things hard. It wasn't the first search warrant for this address and probably wouldn't be the last.

"Entertaining, did you not get the message?" Now that she was on maternity leave and close to having the baby she had agreed to a group chat just to stop the need to repeat herself three times because everyone wanted to know the same thing.

"Oh no I did, I thought she was joking?"

"She doesn't joke about things like that. If the baby isn't born by the weekend she will repaint the nursery."

"Aren't you renting?"

"So? That apparently is irrelevant." Adam used air quotes and Kevin giggled. Kim was apparently 'so fucking over it' and Adam seemed to be copping the brunt of it all. Although there were also a lot of moments when Kim sought out Adam for a lot of comfort and reassurance. She was very physical lately and loved to be close to him and he loved that.

"She's going nuts isn't she?"

"Yep."

As expected the search warrant didn't go smoothly and it took them half a day to track down who they were looking for, he wasn't at home and his two housemates could barely remember their own names and were of little help. It was a wild goose chase and both of them were tired, hungry and grumpy by the time they got the idiot in the back of a patrol car.

Adam checked his phone. He'd had a call from Kim an hour ago and she'd left him a voice message and three texts asking him to call her. "Fuck." He listened to the message and quickly hit the speed dial.

"Hey sorry, what's going on? Are you okay? Where are you?"

"I'm at home. I think I am in labour."

His voice went up about three octaves. "How long? How far apart?"

"Twenty minutes for the past two hours but they are getting stronger."

"Okay, I'm on my way." He clicked his fingers to indicate to Atwater that they needed to turn the car around. They were almost back to the District. "Have you called the hospital?"

"No, I was waiting for you." The closer it got the more Kim relied on Adam. Everyone took a little step back and let him take the lead. Not only was she nervous about the birth but the whole situation with who the father was, or wasn't just bought it to a new level. Adam was surprisingly calm about it all, he'd learnt that she didn't need him to tell her to stop worrying, to calm down and that she'd be fine…she just needed him to listen to her rants.

"Alright, we are ten minutes away. I need to call Voight and then I will call you back okay?"

Kim didn't want him to hang up and begged him to hurry. "Tell Atwater to stop driving like an old lady."

"Hey Sarge…."

"Where are you? This was not supposed to take all day."

"I know, look he was hard to track & he's on his way in with Patrol, anyway Burgess is in labour." Adam sounded strangely calm but he was anything but. His insides were churning and he thought he might just vomit with the way Kevin was driving. "Atwater's going to take us to the hospital but I'm out for the day."

Voight changed his tune quickly and told him to go, not that Adam needed his permission and Voight was well aware this was a courtesy call not a request. "Is she okay?"

"Don't know, she says she's fine, like twenty minutes or something." Voight was the last person he wanted to be talking to right now. "Anyway can you tell Platt? I need to get back to Kim."

Kim was clutching her phone and almost jumped out of her skin when it rang again. "You okay?" Adam asked before she could speak. She had been walking around their apartment all morning and she guessed this is what they called 'nesting' although typically it was supposed to happen earlier than this, not when she was actively in labour. She packed and re-packed her bag several times and re-organised the baby's clothes twice. When she couldn't get hold of Adam she had started to panic and the longer it took for him to get back to her the more her anxiousness increased. She couldn't do this without him, she didn't want to. Adam was going to tell her it was going to be okay; he was her person.

"Yeah. Hurry up please."

"Hey, we are almost there. Atwater is freaking out right now." Adam wasn't exactly calm either, they were both on edge. This was way more intimidating than any ambush they walked into. At least they had training and some idea of what they were doing, Adam had been in the birthing prep classes and yet still felt woefully under prepared. Atwater had bailed three minutes into watching a childbirth video so he was useless and Platt was strangely hysterical about the whole thing and apparently sent Mouch to sleep in the spare room for three nights because she was worried she'd somehow fall pregnant, which was absurd and hilarious at the same time.

"What about you?"

"Cool as a cucumber." Kim heard Atwater scoff in the background. Atwater knew him as well as she did; he was like a duck, smooth sailing on the surface but underneath he'd be going a million miles an hour. "Voight's letting Platt know, she'll meet us there." He could hear her phone beeping with another call. "That's Platt right?" He laughed.

"It is."

"Go talk to her, she'll rip me limb from limb if I am the reason you reject her call."

Kim literally flew into his arms as soon as he arrived despite being mid contraction. She clung to him and groaned loudly and Adam freaked out. "You are not having it right now are you?" It was intense and he had no idea what was going on. Atwater stood at the doorway in complete disarray until he decided to abscond with her bag down to the car. He needed catch his breath and calm the fuck down. He was in no way prepared to help his best friend give birth.

"No, I don't think so. I don't know. I need to go to the hospital. I'm scared Adam, I can't do this."

"Hey, hey." He rocked her slowly and whispered in her ear. "We are doing this, together remember. We are going to meet our little one today. I'm right here."

"Why aren't you freaking out?"

"Remember what I told you before, externally calm, internally freaking the fuck out." He kissed her forehead. "Shit girl, I love you."

Adam walked slowly down the hall, just taking one last minute to get his head around everything that had transpired over the past few hours. It had been a rough labour, long and painful and Kim had really struggled. It was incredibly terrifying and equally amazing to watch her go through it. He felt useless for most of it but he couldn't imagine being anywhere else.

Everyone was up out of their seats the moment he pushed open the doors to the waiting room.

"He's perfect." Adam grinned. "All 9lbs 6ozs of him. He's doing great, Kim is good. He didn't want to budge and it was pretty rough for a while, but they are both okay."

He opened his phone and showed them all a video as their family crowded around him. The baby was splayed out on Kim's chest, wailing manfully at life. "I'm just glad it's over to be honest."

"Ohh, a boy, he's beautiful." Platt gasped. "I just want to snuggle him forever."

"In a little while. It was a pretty tough delivery; Kim is just waiting to be transferred back to the ward and then she'll be ready to show him off." Adam shoved his hands in his pockets so that no one could see them shaking. He'd had to make decisions that he wasn't ready for. They were close to doing an emergency C-section and Kim had refused. She baulked at have a catheter inserted when they were worried she hadn't voided for a while and that were concerned her bladder may rupture during the delivery. Adam was asked to make a call when Kim become disorientated and dehydrated. He agreed to the catheter and then to the C-Section but then suddenly she started crowning and her little boy slid into the world just minutes later.

"Does he have a name?" Kevin was ecstatic and just wanted to see his girl and meet this new little dude.

"Not yet." Adam shook his head, it had all been a little hectic after the delivery, he had needed a few extra minutes of oxygen to get him going but he was doing well now. Kim knew that Blair's family were really hoping for a boy and that he would be named after his father but Kim didn't want to saddle him with that legacy so she was struggling a little. Adam had his suspicions that Kim was hoping for a girl to avoid that decision and when he was a boy it had rattled her.

They'd had a few discussions about names and Adam certainly had some opinions, he let her know when he really hated a name but knew that it wasn't his decision to make. He really felt like he didn't have that right. Kim had settled on a few different names and then decided she didn't like any of them once she had seen him. So they were back to square one and Adam again didn't want to influence her one way or the other. "Anyway I'm going to get back in there. As soon as she's up for it I will let you know."

Kim wasn't doing so well; she was an emotional mess. This had taken a bigger toll on her than she imagined and she was shocked that when she looked at the baby she didn't 'love him' instantly. When he got back to her room the baby was in the cot beside her and Kim's eyes were closed. He sat on the edge of the bed and rested his hand on her leg and his heart broke to see the tears tumble down her cheeks.

"Oh Kim Darlin', let it out."

"I should love him and I do, I really do, it's just…." She sobbed. "…this is not how I wanted this to happen. I wanted him to be yours, I wanted this to be our moment. I've let you down."

"You haven't let me down and this is our moment. I never wanted this for you either or for me but we can't sit here and worry about the what if's and maybes. We've got a baby to raise together into an incredible boy and man. That's all that matters."

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Him."

"Don't be sorry Kim, don't, I'm here because I want to be. I am not his father but I can be his Dad. Anyone can father a child, it's the next twenty, thirty, forty years that matter. This is what it is, let's look ahead, not back."

"If Blair was here he'd be in his life, he'd be his Dad."

"I know, I know but he wouldn't be with you because you and me, that was unstoppable." Adam reached for her hand and ran his fingers up and down her palm. He hated seeing her struggling at a time when she should be enjoying getting to know her little boy. He wanted to fix it for her and he couldn't. He wanted to find the right words to make everything better but he didn't know what they were. "I know he's not my biological child, but I can still fill a role in his life, I can fill that role in his life because otherwise he doesn't get it and no child deserves that. He's got a tribe behind him Kim, there is a waiting room full of people waiting to meet him and love him and that's a good thing. Is it perfect? No it's not but we've got to make it as perfect as we can with the cards we've been dealt."

"I don't deserve you."

"Yes you do and he deserves us." The baby squirmed and let out a little cry, he was a little random at the moment they were figuring out. Neither of them really had a clue what they were doing. "Can I pick him up?"

"Sure."

Adam had one quick hold just after he was born and he was pretty grimy and bloody which had shocked him a little, now he was settled and peaceful so he gently picked him up and cradled him to his chest. It had been a long time since he'd held a baby this small. His nephew was the last baby he held. Kim closed her eyes and just listened to him talk to the little boy. "Hey, my man. You are one handsome dude; the ladies are going to love you. All the good bits of your Mom and Dad. You are one lucky bub, see this woman here, love of my life, my reason for living and she's gonna love you so much you won't know what hit you. And then just outside there is this tribe, this family that adore you already. You will never wonder if you are loved." He bent down and kissed his slightly wrinkled forehead, with his dark hair poking out from under his little blue hat. "I love you."

Ginny came in first. She had arrived just after Adam had gone back in having got on the first flight she could when Atwater called her. "How's Kim? How's it going?" She rushed at Atwater. Adam had asked him to let Kim be the one to tell her it was a boy. It was the one thing she had asked for.

"She's okay, the baby is here and it's all good. They are just settling Kim into her room and Adam will come and get you."

"And? Boy or Girl?"

"I've been sworn to secrecy, Kim wants to tell you." Atwater assured her that they were both perfectly healthy and there were no concerns.

"Oh, this is torture." She sighed. They had come to an understanding. Ginny had backed off and let Kim do it her way and Kim had done her best to include Blair's family, she always sent them her scans and updates and photos of their new apartment with the nursery all set up. They had found a small three bedroom place and moved in just two weeks before her due date. In the end she went four days early but they had had a pretty big working party to move them in and get it all sorted and Kim didn't lift a finger.

Ginny was overwhelmed when Kim told her that the third bedroom was for her and she was welcome to come visit at any time. It was a nice balance that they reached, whether that changed now he was here was yet to be seen.

She sat down heavily. "I can't believe it. And Kim's okay?"

"She is, Adam said it was tough but we've got a healthy mom and bub and that's all we wanted."

"You know, those two?"

"Always meant to be together. He's a good guy, he'll take care of both of them, otherwise I'll kick his ass I promise."

"I know." She shook her head. "You know in the beginning I thought she can't do that; she can't move on. I sort of expected her to be single forever because you know it was my brother's baby but that's stupid. She never really loved Blair, I can see that but I know she'll love his baby and they will take care of him." Ginny looked a little sheepish. "Then I will admit, and I told Kim when you walked into that restaurant I kinda hoped you were Adam, you know." She shrugged. The thought that the new man in Kim's life was one of them had been a fleeting but nice thought. It wasn't to be though but knowing that Kevin was so close to them eased that disappointment.

"I'm not half the man he is."

"He's been so great. He really loves Kim and I can see that and I can see how much he cares about Bean. I'm just happy to be involved."

"Hey, you are Aunt Ginny, nobody is taking that away from you."

"I know." She laughed. "You and Adam, you are both too hard to hate."

Adam came out and congratulated Ginny on becoming an Aunt. "Go on in, there is this perfect little human waiting to meet you."

Ginny almost ran down the hall and knocked quietly on the door and Kim beckoned her in. "Congratulations." She was sitting up in the bed cradling the baby. Watching Adam with him had started to kick her maternal instincts into gear.

"Thanks Ginny. Come in, come and have a cuddle."

She noticed his little blue cap immediately. "It's a boy?"

"He is, he's all boy, all 9lbs 6 ozs of him."

"Oh Kim." She laid the baby in her Aunt's arms. "He's so beautiful, thank you. He looks a little like Blair does from his baby photos. He's just perfect."

"Riley; Riley Blair Williams Burgess." Adam had loved the name; it was one of his favourites and he had been surprised when Kim told him she'd made the decision to call him Riley. Kim wanted a name that Adam loved to thank him for choosing to be in her baby's life. It was sweet but she also wanted to honour the fact that Blair was his father. They had thought of Will, but having Will Halstead as a close friend felt weird and Billy was a no go because Kim's first boyfriend and first broken heart was Billy Weston and she just couldn't do it. Adam had teased her, asking if he should be worried that she'd leave him if Billy reappeared and Kim had told him yes, yes he should be worried and Billy or any form of William was scratched off the list.

"Hi Riley, oh you are the sweetest baby in the world. I love you so much already." Ginny kissed his forehead. Ginny had long prepared herself for Kim not naming the baby after her brother but she did like that she did include him. Her parents, probably weren't going to be quite so forgiving, they had their heart set on a boy named Blair. "He's perfect. And you? You are okay?"

"I'm okay, sore, tired and very emotional but I am okay. I'm glad he's here and safe and healthy." Kim squeezed Ginny's hand as the tears trickled from the corners of her eyes. "Welcome to our family Ginny."

"Thank you. Thank you." Kim could see how much this meant to Ginny and she did get emotional watching her with her nephew. It was a beautiful moment.

"Shall we call your parents? I'm sure they'd love to meet him."

"I didn't tell them you were in labour." Ginny admitted, sheepishly even though she promised them she would. When Kevin rang her to tell her that Kim was in labour it was a very overwhelming moment, the thought of seeing some part of her brother again and meeting his child was more difficult to reconcile than she thought it would be. "I couldn't stand the millions of messages I'd get."

"I'm dreading looking at my phone, Trudy's probably been busy." Kim had turned her phone off as she ticked over five hours of labour. She just couldn't deal the constant buzzing and left it up to Adam to keep everyone up to date.

They called Blair's parents, and they were delighted but Kim and Ginny could both tell they were a little put out about the name. Adam came in after the call, along with the name issue they still weren't happy that Adam was in the baby's life so he agreed it was best not to be around for this moment. They were old and set in their ways but Ginny managed them well. Ginny left Kim to call her family and once she called her mother and sister she let Adam know that it was time to let Intelligence off the chain. Kevin and Trudy were first and then over the next hour or so Jay, Voight, Hailey and Vanessa all came to meet Riley. He was the perfect angel and slept all through it.

It was sweet watching Voight with him, they were used to emotion from him, it was just that the most common emotion from him was anger. This little boy bought out a whole new side to him, filling the hole a little that was left by the grandson he never saw. He was in love and they struggled to get Riley back off him so everyone else could have a cuddle.

It was a few hours before it all calmed down and it was just Adam left. "You can go out for a drink with the others. We'll be okay?" There was a lot of talk about heading to Molly's to celebrate Riley. Uncle Kevin and Aunt Trudy were leading the charge and Trudy even declared the first round was on her.

"I kinda like it here." He was watching Riley sleep in his arms. "I can't imagine life without him now. That's crazy isn't it?"

"No, not really." Kim smiled. "He looks good on you. I can't wait to see you with your own baby one day. I want you to be a Dad."

"I honestly can't imagine it would feel any different." He wiped away a tear that forced its way out. "I can't believe you said that."

"What?" Kim was worried that she had said the wrong thing. It had been a lot of back and forth as to whether Adam would be called Adam or Dad. Right now he was going to be Adam, they didn't want to overshadow Riley's arrival with any angst about Adam being called Dad. She knew, while Blair's parents were happy to be getting a grandchild and Kim made sure they had a place in Riley's life they were firmly in the camp that Blair was his father and weren't ready to let Adam be 'Dad.' They thought they would ease into it and over time see how it went. Trudy had talked sense to them both.

_'Just give them this right now, you know as well as anyone that by the time this baby is talking they will be looking for their Dad and that will be Adam. Labels aren't important to you or to Adam because you both know the role he is playing but it is important to them.' _She was right, what Adam was called wasn't that important to them, he was the one who was going to be there every day through sleepless nights, illness, when they were scared, when they wanted a cuddle, to play, to learn and to live.

"My own baby one day. I want this moment again, with you." Adam ran his forefinger over Riley's cheek and let him curl his little hand around it as it rested against his own face. His tiny fingers holding on for dear life. "But I am so happy I'm in his life, I love him Kim. I really do."

"This is just the start for us."


	12. Living Proof

"Dada, Dada" Adam peeled his eyes open and found himself staring directly into the cutest set of brown eyes ever seen. "Up Dada."

"Riley Bud, Dada's tired."

"Up Dada, Up now." He tugged on his hand.

Adam had barely had time to shut his eyes. He had crawled into bed little over two hours ago and was hoping that he'd get a least another hour before Riley woke, he usually wasn't up quite this early.

"How about you hop into bed?" He lifted him up and over and plonked him down on Kim's side of the bed.

"Momma?"

"Not here Bud, go back to sleep."

"No Dada, up. Momma up."

"Momma's not here." Adam closed his eyes, resting one hand on Riley's stomach hoping he'd settle and go back to sleep or at least lay quietly. "Shhh."

It lasted all of two minutes. Riley had lay quietly, cuddling up to his 'shrag', for some reason he called his security blanket shrag, they had no idea why or where the name even came from. Voight had bought it for him when he was born and Riley never went anywhere without it. It was tatty and had been through the wash more times than they could count and had therefore lost all its colour. It started off blue and was now a dirty faded grey but Riley loved it. One thing Voight had taught them was the wisdom of stocking up. He hadn't bought Riley just one, he'd bought three for when tragedy inevitably struck and his shrag was lost.

They had replaced it once so they were grateful for Voight's foresight. Even that had been rough; shrag had melted on a wood burning heater when they were staying at a lodge when they went away for a long weekend. Riley had been throwing it around and it had landed on the heater and melted on contact. Riley was distraught and it took him a good week to get used to the new one but eventually he became just as old and tatty as the first one. It was the type of parenting tips that only experience could provide.

Even when he just forgot it, it was epic. Having left it in the bullpen one day Adam promised to bring it home with him but Kim had called and he'd heard the hysterical screams of a child who's whole life had apparently fallen apart because he didn't have his 'shrag'. Platt, god love her organised for two of her patrol officers to drop it off as Adam was knee deep in preparing for a raid. A little while after Kim sent him a video of their sleeping boy, his chest still randomly heaving as he cuddled up with his shrag.

Groaning he rolled away as his phone rang, knocking it onto the floor as he reached for it he bent down to pick it up he smiled when he saw who it was.

"Hey Darlin'. How are my two favourite girls?"

"One's asleep and one's missing home and her boys."

"Did you get some sleep too? You should sleep when she does, it was a big night for you."

"I got a couple of hours. Is Bean awake? Have you told him?"

"He is awake, lying beside me at the moment talking gibberish to himself. He just woke me up."

He switched it to video. "Hey Riles, say Hi to Mom."

"Momma." Kim was so happy to see him, his bright smile lighting up his face. He had definitely inherited that from his father, as well as his slightly darker colouring. He was a beautiful little boy and would light up any room he was in.

"Hi Riley, Hi, my magic Bean. Mommy misses you."

"Momma up?"

"I am up, and I've got a surprise for you, it's your sister. This is Evie."

Kim had given birth to their baby girl in the early hours of the morning. Trudy had happily come over and stayed with him and she was still asleep in the spare room he assumed. He didn't wake her when he got in two hours ago, he quickly checked on Riley and hit the sack.

Compared to Riley's birth it was a lot smoother and they felt more in control. She was a little smaller than her brother at 8lbs 1oz for which Kim was grateful. Having another 9lb baby had frightened her and it was the first she mentioned to Adam after telling him that she was pregnant.

They had gotten married just after Riley turned one. It was small ceremony with just their friends and family present. Adam had proposed just before his first birthday. Trudy had flown into wedding planner mode in the blink of an eye, she wasn't letting these to fuck it up again. Riley deserved better than that.

Kim also wanted to get her career back on track sooner rather than later, she had taken a step back a little even if she was back at work when Riley was six months old. They felt it was better to have another baby close to Riley and this time Adam was taking six months off after Kim's Maternity leave. He was hitting pause on his career so Kim could resume hers, they thought it was best for their family.

"Oh Bub." Riley cooed, not that he had much of a clue what was going on. They had tried to tell him but he was just too young to get it. He had turned two just a couple of weeks ago and was full of beans. He was a happy boy, as long as he got his way; his terrible twos had hit with a vengeance, it had been like flicking a switch. The last few months he seemed to have exploded and his development was going ahead in leaps and bounds which led to some epic meltdowns when things didn't go his way.

They had to put him in a big bed earlier than they hoped because he had figured out how to climb out of his crib. Kim was terrified that he would fall and hurt himself. She had woken Adam up one morning when she yelped and leapt out of bed. It was the softest of touches and her eyes flew open to find Riley standing beside her patting her on her face. "Momma, Momma." He was smiling and very happy with himself. It had been a rude way to wake up for Adam and Kim instantly blamed him for not putting the side of his crib up properly when he put him to bed last night but on inspection it was still firmly in place and obviously he'd been up for a while because his room was trashed.

When it kept happening they had to move him into a big bed, which probably worked out well with the baby coming but meant that he was hard to keep in his room and bed at night. He'd get up at least four times once he was in bed and they had to keep taking him back and as soon as he opened his eyes in the morning he was up and in their room. It didn't matter if it was 4am or 7, when Riley was up so were they. They waxed and waned who'd get to sleep in and the closer Kim got to delivering Adam always let her sleep, it wouldn't be long before she was back to getting up three, four, five times a night. If only you could bank sleep.

"Is Daddy going to bring you in soon to meet Evie? I can't wait to see you."

"I will." Riley was already scrambling out of their bed. He never lasted more than a minute on the phone; he was too busy to be tied down for long. "How is she? How'd she go?"

"Really good I think, she slept a fair bit and then woke for a feed and went straight back to sleep."

"So nothing like Riley? I knew my Princess would be a superstar."

"No nothing like him. Thank goodness." Riley hadn't slept much his first two days and then had been a bit all over the shop once they got him home. For a while he had his whole day/night thing out of whack and would sleep for long stretches during the day and nap at night. They tried everything to get him into some kind of routine but if they kept him awake during the day he was a complete nightmare at night. He was nocturnal and it wasn't until he was a little over one that he finally got into some kind of regular sleeping habit.

They made the most of his sudden 'sleeping through' until Kim fell pregnant again and she was up and down all night going to the bathroom. People weren't lying when they said once you had kids you'd never sleep well again.

"How long will you be? The Doctor will be here about nine I think to check her out then we can bath her. Riley might like that."

Adam glanced at the clock; it was just past six. "Sure, I'll get him breakfast and organised and we'll be in. I miss you." Adam smiled at the sudden loud squawk he heard. "Is that my little lady?"

"I miss you too surprisingly, as you were a little annoying last night." Kim laughed and then turned the phone around so he could see his little girl. "Daddy's girl."

"I am going to ignore that comment and tell you I am a lucky, lucky man Kim Burgess, a pigeon pair."

"Can I ask something?"

"Sure." Adam was hauling himself out of bed, Riley had absconded from their bedroom and that was never good, he'd be on a mission to destroy something without a doubt.

"Does it feel different for you?"

"Does what feel different?"

"Evie."

"Well sure Kim, she's a girl. I am already worried about boys, when I will let her date. If there will ever be a man good enough for her and gotta say I have doubts."

"Funny, but you know…."

"Kim, Darlin', I'm a Dad of two. An awesome, handsome yet destructive boy…" he found Riley climbing on the dining table to get to a banana that was in the bowl in the middle of the table. "…and a breathtakingly beautiful girl. I couldn't be happier and I would die for them, both of them."

"Good."

"Hey, what's this about. I thought we talked about this?"

"We did, I was just checking you know that now she is here that you still felt the same." Kim knew that Adam adored Riley, he was always with him, doing all manner of things with him, Riley was his shadow and he was always taking him with him when he went running or even to the store or visit his Dad and Riley thought the sun shone from his 'Dada.' His face would light up when he heard his Dad coming home and Adam always swung him up into the air and smothered him with kisses. She loved how they would cuddle up on the couch on a Sunday and watch at game, which usually meant they'd both fall asleep. It was their thing and Adam hated being called into work and missing out. He always told Kim that DNA made you a father, being there made you a Dad and Riley made him a Dad.

"I could not love Riley more if I tried." He helped him down off the table and finished peeling the banana that he was destroying. "You and me, we've got this."

"Yep."

"Great, now you get some rest, one of us should and Riley had decided it's not going to me be so we will see you both soon."

After sorting out Riley with some toast and starting a coffee for himself he tuned out for a moment while the coffee machine did its thing. He thought about what Kim said, was it different for him? Perhaps it was, but only in the way that Evie was a girl and newly born and helpless and he was her father and needed to protect her. Riley was a boy but he still felt an overwhelming desire to protect him along with an immense sense of responsibility that he raised Riley to be a good man, he was desperate to make sure he grew up to be everything his mother dreamt he'd be the night he was born and everything Blair's family wanted him to be. Riley had his heart from the moment he arrived and he'd taught him how to be a Dad. "I thought I heard you come in." Trudy startled him.

"I tried not to wake you." Trudy loved the smile that lit up his face. "It's a girl."

"A girl. God help her."

"I know right? No dating for her. She's beautiful and Kim did really well, they are both really good. I just spoke to Kim a little while ago." He opened his phone and handed it to Trudy to flick through the dozen photos already on his phone. "Her name is Evie, Evie Grace."

"Congratulations, she's so precious. Wow look at you? You should be proud of yourself Adam. I'm proud of you."

"Thanks Trudy."

"Dada. Drink." Riley suddenly reappeared and tugged on Adam's leg.

"Did you finish your toast?"

"All gone." He held up his hands to show his Dad he didn't have his toast. Now that could mean he ate it all or they would find it sometime later shoved behind a cushion. "Drink."

Adam filled his cup from the fridge and he literally mainlined it. "How was he last night?"

They had called Trudy from the hospital once Kim was admitted and confirmed in labour and Riley hadn't stirred. "You could've just taken the baby monitor to the hospital and watched him from there. Did not hear a peep."

"Slightly illegal, but I'm glad he was good. Kim can't wait to see him."

"He's always good for Ma, he's a good boy unlike you."

"Ahhh, you love me."

"Don't push your luck. I love your wife, your son and your daughter. I tolerate you because I love them."

"Oh I know Trudy, I know." Adam winked at her.

Trudy had been a legend from the moment she found out Kim was pregnant with Riley and still was. They couldn't have asked any more of her, whenever they needed help Trudy was always first in line. One day she came and took him out all day just so they both could sleep. Apparently, according to Mouch he had been a horror show at home for them but Trudy just smiled and told them he was an angel. Riley was the grandchild they never had and Trudy loved that he called them 'Ma and 'ooch.'

Adam dressed him in exactly the clothes that Kim had left out. According to Kim Adam's clothing choices were limited and woefully uncoordinated. He went to work looking like a hobo some days and he often dressed Riley with the same lack of attention to detail. Kim wanted him to look decent when they took photos of him with Evie.

Kim was waiting for him with open arms and Riley literally dived out of his Dad's arms into his Mother's. Evie was asleep in her cot beside Kim's bed and while Kim smothered her boy with love Adam got to cuddle his little girl, he was still coming to terms with the fact he had a daughter. While last time he was sure it was a girl, this time he felt it was a boy. Kim had teased him about how hopeless he was at guessing as he sat, a little gobsmacked, holding his newly born daughter.

Getting Riley to sit still long enough for a photo was a challenge, he squirmed, refused to look at the camera and then did his usual weird cheesy smile that appeared whenever a camera came out. Once they got him sorted Evie started crying which made Riley cry but they eventually got one decent one they could use.

The Doctor came and gave Evie a clean bill of health and was happy for Kim to take her home after lunch. They wanted her to stay twelve hours at least. Riley stood up beside his Mom while she bathed Evie, who howled like a banshee and Adam videoed the whole thing. Despite Evie's desperate cries along with Riley's curious nature and questions they felt a sense of peace in the room. It had been a long hard road to get here, to get their family and their future. They'd had so many twists and turns, and fought hard to make it work. Riley had been a catalyst, he threw them together in a way they never dreamed and despite all the reasons why it shouldn't work, it did. They were determined to make so they didn't just survive, but thrived.

And now here was Evie, it felt like the circle was finally closed. They were complete.

_Our little family is beyond words because there are no words to describe how the birth of your children change your whole world and your whole heart. It's just this incredible love, for them and for the person beside you. _

_Riley and Evie are Living Proof that you can have it all._

_**Well that's it. I never intended that this would come together so quickly and be finished in the week between episodes but I kinda like that it is. It feels right to leave it here. **_

_**I hope it helped soothe some of the anger and disbelief that once again #Burzek & their fans got royally shafted. I can honestly say I have very little interest in the rest of the season as a whole...but will keep an eye on our two faves (except you know when that asshole Roman reappears) and hopefully there is some light for #Burzek soon.**_

_**Thanks for reading & reviewing...thank you for letting 'get this out of my system.**_


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